How Do You Make Love Stay?

When You Love Someone, You Make It Through Your Ruts

The middle-point of your love story is never going to be as exciting as the beginning days when you were first getting to know each other. You are never going to feel the same stir of butterflies when you come home to them asleep on the couch as you felt during your first kiss. You are never going to feel the same rush of excitement when their hand brushes yours to grab the remote as you did when they sat side-by-side with you on your first date.

You are going to grow comfortable with each other over the course of your relationship, and although that is a good thing, it can also be a boring thing. However, you cannot mistake your boredom for falling out of love. You cannot mistake your boredom for being in the wrong relationship.

When you are in a rut with someone you love, someone you trust, someone you consider your best friend, you should not assume the relationship is falling apart at the seams just because things have been a little different lately. You should not assume the feelings you experienced in your puppy love days are never going to return full-blast.

When you are in a rut with someone you love, you should come up with a plan for emerging from your mundane routine. You should not assume there is nothing you can do to fix things. You should not look for excitement outside of your relationship. You should not search for someone new who will inspire all of the old feelings you miss experiencing from your person.

When you love someone, the answer is never to stray. It is never to cheat. It is never to close yourself off to them and refuse to explain what has been bothering you because you are afraid of making things awkward.

When you love someone, you make it through your ruts. You talk through what you have been feeling. You get their side of the story and compare it to yours. You come to compromises. You make plans to take dates in new cities and try new positions in the bedroom. You freshen up your love. You create a new set of sparks.

When you love someone, you do not break up after a small stretch of boredom. You do not let your restlessness convince you to move onto another. You stay and you come up with a game plan. You list out your fears and your hopes for the relationship and you sort out your feelings. Together.

When you love someone, you are teammates. You tell each other everything, even the awkward things. Even the things you are uncomfortable sharing. You place the relationship before everything else because this person means the world to you. You could not imagine losing them and you would never dream of doing anything to sabotage the relationship.

When you love someone, you put in the necessary time and effort to make it through your ruts. You do not consider them the end of your romance. You consider them small bumps along the road to eternity. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Holly is the author of Severe(d): A Creepy Poetry Collection.

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