1. You’re getting desperate. Whenever you meet a guy, you convince yourself that he’s the one before even getting to know him. You’re so ready to fall in love that you take whatever you can get — which means you’re going to end up settling. You’re going to end up unhappy.
2. You’ve been feeling unattractive lately. You shouldn’t look to a boy to feel better about yourself. Sex isn’t going to boost your self-esteem — not permanently, at least. So try going for a jog. Dyeing your hair. Buying a new eyeshadow palette. Cultivate self-love instead of looking for it in a stranger’s eyes.
3. Dating has been bringing you down. You’re sick of first dates. Meaningless conversations. Inappropriate “compliments” and sexts from fuckboys. You need a break. You need to remember that you’re more than a vagina, more than an object. That you have a lot more to give than just your body.
4. You aren’t happy with yourself. Maybe you should stop looking for someone to love and learn to love the person in your mirror. You’re not going to get rid of her, so you might as well get used to her.
5. You find yourself changing. Your personality (and wardrobe) shouldn’t be morphing to fit in with whatever boy you’re interested in at the moment. If you’re becoming a clone of your crush, then you need some space. You need to remember who you really are.
6. You’re too busy. You barely have time to feed your dog, let alone get drinks with your friends or return your mom’s phone calls. If you’re swamped, don’t put too much on your plate. Don’t make life harder than it has to be.
7. You’re heartbroken. Despite what your friends say, getting under someone else isn’t the healthiest way to get over an ex. If your heart still needs patching, then give it time to heal. Don’t jump straight into a new relationship.
8. You’re overstressed. Dating is meant to be fun. Exciting. If it’s only adding more stress to your life, then delete Tinder and Hater. Focus on work. Focus on family. Focus on getting your shit together.
9. You just want some fun. Marriage doesn’t have to be the end goal. If you want to flirt, flirt. If you want a hookup, then hook up. Nothing is stopping you. Don’t let judgements hold you back. There’s nothing wrong with wanting sex from a stranger.
10. You don’t know what the hell you want. It’s hard to tell when you should accept dates and when you should turn them down. When you should keep texting that boy or ignore his messages. If you don’t know what you want, you won’t end up with anything good. So wait a while. The right boy will still be out there when you’re done finding yourself.
11. You don’t want a boyfriend. Don’t let your friends and divorced aunts convince you to date before you get too old and gray to find anyone that wants you. If you’re happy being single, stay single. Live your life. It belongs to you.