Thought Catalog
June 12, 2017

Stay Single, Because Modern Dating Is Exhausting

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Ishan @seefromthesky

No, really. Stay single.

And yes, you have probably heard to stay single because you’re awesome and shiny and full of magical potential, but honestly? Stay single because modern dating is flat out EXHAUSTING. It’s time consuming and aggravating and infuriating. And it’s probably (most definitely) not worth your time or my time.

Modern dating is like trying to swim in the Atlantic Ocean just waiting for sharks to attack you. It’s like sitting in the Sahara Desert waiting for the sky to open up and downpour on you. It’s like going to the dentist and realizing that you have five cavities and they forgot to numb you first.

It’s like opening up your Halloween bag when you’re a kid, and only finding apples and organic granola bars. It’s like graduating from college and expecting to land your dream job, but instead you land a job at Yankee Candle.

It’s expecting you are going to get something wonderful on your Christmas wish list, and finding a chunk of coal in your stocking instead.

So maybe we should all just stay single. For the sake of our sanity. For the sake of our hearts and our minds and our souls.

Because the truth is, you are going to get hurt. No matter what the situation is and no matter who you are. Whether it’s from a girl who only wants you as arm candy, or if it’s a boy who sees you as a sex object. You are going to get hurt whether you’re in a casual relationship or a one night stand or a summer fling.

It all ends in chaos that should have never started in the first place.

And look, I’m not saying love is dead. I’m not saying you or I will never ever find true love, but my god, this shit is HARD. Was it this hard for our parents or grandparents? It certainly was never even this hard in high school. I guess I thought people were supposed to grow up by now, but I keep getting proven wrong.

I keep seeing so many amazing single people and I am always continuously surprised to hear their stories of love and heartache and rejection. I know so many great people who can’t stop getting burned again and again. I see so many amazing women in my circle of friends and I am mind blown that they keep getting played and toyed with. It is absolutely infuriating.

So maybe we should just all stop. We should stop scrolling and double tapping. We should delete all our useless dating apps. We should stop trying to make people want us who don’t. We should stop pursuing people who don’t want to be pursued.

Maybe we should just hit pause. Sit back. Sip on some wine. Stop trying so hard and feeling too much. Maybe we should fix our broken pieces on our own first. Maybe we should try to love ourselves first. Try to find out who we are instead of searching for someone else.

Maybe all we need to do is to find ourselves. to love ourselves. To worship our own selves, instead of worshipping people who don’t even deserve our hearts. TC mark