I’m On Ambien
I was reading Louis Ferdninad Celine’s Journey to the End of the Night when I began to feel the effects of the ambien I had taken ~20 minutes ago
remembered tweeting something like this at Brandon Gorrell and being curious to try this, to see what would happen
my eyes seem to slip off of the words in the celine book… I am more aware now of the shapes af the paragraphs… the corners and the parts where there is text vs/ where there is no text
I thought I deleted this, but I must have minimized a window or something
several tries to type ‘orsomething” came out like “rorsemthing’
I don’t think the ambien effect has ‘peaked’
trouble typing some of the words in previous sentence (I don’t think, words, ambien effect)
resolving now to go with thincorrect spellings an stugf
I can read the names on the people in my gchat bar, should I talk to someone?
Peole hwho I could g-chat with on ambien:
a close friend of Lauren’s named Cassidy Hartman (we don’t chat unless to make plans for some social thing – we had drinks recentli in Los Angeles) Jake Viator is a sound and audio guy who worked with me on a job in LA he’s a very chill guy, if I was chatting with him I’m proabblu chatting about music stuff. James George jsut raised a lot of money on Kickstarter to fund a film that will use RGBD technology… somethng I played ith an thought ot was cool.. I gate him I think 50$. John Honeyman is a tree planters who I became friends with through my film Franz Otto Ultimate Highballer. Kevin Naulls used to play drums in a band I played in? I can’t remember. Or he promoted me to a canadian fasion blogger maybe… mixing up my kevins (I have never chatted with this person). Noah Kalina I have never talked to….Steffen Kramer was my boss when I was a very young man, a treeplanter. AP Walton is an isolated devotee of (I’m not sure what kind of poetry) we don’t talk that much recently.
I’m going to say “Hi” to Noah Kalina (photographer), first time making contact
….10 seconds and no response
What would I say to him anyways?
Still not responding, though he is “fully green”
Does Noha Kalina know anything about me? Has he seen my name somewhere? Or is this for him totally ‘out of the blue’ (If you’re green in my feed is it possible that I am not in his feed?)
I am going to say ‘Sup!’ to see if this makes noah respond.
I got up and walked to my desk to get my ecigarette and dfelt unstable
is there a way to initiate contact with Noah Kalina? Should I tru a “hey bro?”
should I ask a question?
imagining noah kalina ‘deadpan face’ vintage noah ‘deadpan face’ time lapsed
I could ask noah if he is still doing those time lapses of his face….
Feel like I’ve settled upon this goal of talking to Noah Kalina but the goal is absurd. I don’t know what I want to talk about.
Should I talk to AP Walton, the poet? yeah.
I’m going to write to him, ‘sup fag’ (I don’t think he’ll like it)
mistakenly put two ‘sup fag’s into the chat…
AP Walton’s status has gone from green to yellow. (I often ignore him when he writes me even with seemingly innocent stuff like, “what are you doing this weekend” I’ll just not respond… he is a ‘long struggling poet’ with ‘extreme reverance for art’ and is thus pretty socially isolated and critical towards me in sort of obvious ways
Can’t believe Noah Kalina didn’t respond to ‘Sup!’ Seems so positive and encouraging…
Now looking at a facebook photo I have been tagged in but I’m not in the photo. I am tagged as a peice of steak on a plate that is being held by Zachary German. In the photo z is wearing a superbowl t-shirt.
AP Walton answers: ?
What should I say?
ty[ed suo then sup
I just feel a little bit disconnected. I feel like I could fall asleep if I wanted to but I'm curious to where this is going.
Lauren is scolding our cat in the other room, I can hear her and I can hear the cat. Now lauren is maneuvering a bag of bottles, which is loud.
Cat has now taken position to my right on the floor and is looking at me expectingly but has already been fed.
Eyes can't seem to focus on the parts of the screen that I want them to focus on.
Lauren is getting into bed. Scolds me for smoking my e-cigarette in bed. Lauren has been reading into what it's like to biu a foreclosed home in New York.
No further communication from Poet AP Walton.
Going to bed now.
A | A | A
Be the girl who knows how to choose her battles wisely. Be the girl who will fight for what she believes in, but not fight for the sake of fighting.
What I have to say, what she will never say, is that you absolutely need to back off, now.
Not many twenty-somethings want to be “tied down” before 30, but many of us also crave something less superficial than a series of one night stands.
It was years ago, and I still struggle to describe it; I suppose that’s how you know it was true love.