In a society where 2 a.m. booty calls, talking to a plethora of different people at once, and ghosting has become the norm, it can be difficult to know what is acceptable to put up with and what you should walk away from.

We have fallen so far from what healthy, authentic relationships look like that we just convince ourselves that the half-assed thing we’re in the middle of is a normal and perfectly fine way to be treated.

I want you to take a step back and realize that it’s not. It’s not okay for them to not respond to your texts, only to reply back a week later with, “Sorry, I’ve been busy. How are you?” It’s not okay for them to never plan a true date and to instead just invite you out to the bar or over to their place on the weekends. It’s not okay for them to take advantage of your kind and giving heart just to get in your pants.

None of it is okay because you deserve the world. You deserve someone who goes to bed thinking about you and wakes up sending you cute “good morning” texts. You deserve someone who doesn’t care if all of their friends are giving them grief for wanting to spend more time with you because they know you truly are something special. You deserve someone who won’t play games with you and leave you wondering where they stand, but rather shows you with their actions and words just how much you mean to them.

And the thing I want most for you is to genuinely believe this — to believe that you are worthy of this type of relationship. You don’t have to settle for what society might tell you is normal. There is someone out there begging the Universe to send them someone exactly like you. Someone with your exact heart and personality and values and passions.

But you will never meet this person if you continue settling. So now is the time for you to say no to anyone that treats you as ordinary so that you can be ready for somebody to treat you as extraordinary.