Ted Pillow

Have you ever wondered why, exactly, Glen Bishop existed in the Mad Men universe? What was the point of this marginal character who somehow kept turning up again and again? Well, he’s played by Marten Weiner, the son of showrunner Matthew Weiner. So, there you go.

The average penis size is only 5 inches. Aha! Did you hear that, Karen!?! 5 inches!!

10 Words or Fewer Summary: Chilling documentary explores family’s unimaginable secrets

Most guys tend to lose themselves in the moment, so it can’t hurt to try and plan out what you’re going to say at your climax, rather than just blurting out the first thing that comes to mind (i.e., “9/11 was an inside job!” or just “UGHHHNNGGN!”)

“That’s so raven.”

A patently ludicrous cult thriller about Devil worship and human sacrifice in which Martin Sheen screams a lot, The Believers occupies a strange space between camp and grim mean-spiritedness (the opening scene seems specifically designed to have traumatically scarred me as a child, which is exactly what it did).

Girls go crazy for complex, intricately sculpted facial hair.

There’s no set rule on how long a kiss should last. A good rule of thumb is to stop once you’ve had an orgasm. Then you pretty much just crawl up into the fetal position until they leave.

Once you get the phone number, it’s time to start sexting.

10 Words or Fewer Summary: Computer chess nerds congregate in hotel, insanity ensues.

Sometimes I’m just doing the best I can.

After spending the past several days ignoring the demands of my daily life, I present to you some of the strangest things I found.

An unheralded film about champion 80s arcade gamers that I serendipitously found on Hulu turned out to be one of my favorite documentaries of the decade.

I should not use Wikipedia while drinking.

If the person is deceased, are they flirting? Although all scientific, medical, and legal knowledge points to “no,” 4 out of 5 Insane Clown Posse Juggalos say “yes.”

‘Kiss Kiss Bang Bang’ arrived like a breath of fresh air, radiating wit and charm.

We’ve said goodbye in driveways, bus stations, and airports, in parking lots and on street corners. Long distance relationships mean always having to say goodbye.

Exactly which holidays are federal holidays and which are just the stupid ones.