10 People Reveal The Dirty Details Of Their Most Shocking Sex Dreams

Shutterstock, Mayer George
Shutterstock, Mayer George

1. “I’m a vet and I love animals, but I’ve never thought of any single non-human creature in a sexual way. It really fucked me up a few weeks ago when I dreamt that I was sleeping with a goat. The worst part is, it wasn’t just about the sex. I was legitimately in love with the thing. I caressed it and stuff. Gives me the creeps just retelling it, man.” — Claus, 27

2. “In my weirdest dream of all time, I’m a door-to-door saleswoman, but I’m not peddling skincare products or fancy knives. I’m selling my virginity. I go from suburban town to suburban town, telling every guy I encounter that I’ve never been penetrated and that they can take my virginity for a cool $1,000. Literally every single guy accepts my offer and the dream-me gets high off of the deceipt, and of course the money.” — Cheryl, 33

3. “My mom’s an attractive older woman and my buddies have been riding me about it ever since I can remember. I swear it’s their fault that I had this messed up dream the other night that my own mother and I had the hots for each other. She seduced me and I let her because all I wanted was to suck on her tits. I woke up crazy sweaty, sucking my thumb. Whack, man. Whack.” — Carlyle, 29

4. “I’ve always been into a little light BDSM and in my craziest sex dream, I got straight up violent on my husband. I tied him up and blindfolded him and then I started spanking him with a ping pong paddle and flogging him with a series of torture devices I don’t actually own in real life. He kept begging for more and I kept giving it to him, even though he was bleeding. I was covered in blood and so was he when I finally realized I’d accidentally killed him.” — Hayley, 28

5. “I dreamt that I was swimming in an ocean of cum, riding the white sticky waves and taking gulps in as often as possible. After a few minutes of swimming, I head back to my towel on the beach dripping in milky white goo, smiling at my boyfriend who’s just chilling there, watching me. Such an anti-feminist head trip. What’s wrong with me???” — Martha, 31

6. “So it’s the future, and my husband and I are super wealthy and we live in this lavish mansion and we each have our own sex slave that we can call on whenever we please for a little naked play. Sensual massages, oral, anal, you name it. Everything’s on the menu, even good ol’ fashioned missionary penetration. But one day my husband’s having intercouse with his female robot, Kyla, when she short-circuits and somehow castrates him! Instead of calling the hospital or helping my poor hubby out, I decide it’s a great opportunity to grab the baby and run away with my mechanical gigolo! I have NO idea what any of it means, and I’m not sure I want to.” — Alina, 35

7. “I dreamt that I had a rocking body and I was this really successful stripper named Shandra who was known for breaking the ‘champagne room rule’—for the right price. I was living it up, making serious bank. But one night I showed up to work dressed in my signature hot pink g-string bikini and everyone started plugging their noses as I walked by. For whatever reason, I suddenly had uncontrollable body odor and I couldn’t shake it, no matter how many showers I took. It was the worst curse. I looked hot AF, but no one wanted to be anywhere near me.” — Matilda, 32

8. “It’s been ten years, and I still haven’t gotten over my college sweetheart. She dumped my ass a month after graduation, when she met some 30-something banker who could take care of her, or whatever. They’re married now with a kid on the way and I’m still living in my parent’s basement. Anyway, I have this recurring dream that I’m fucking my ex from behind on the hood of my car and I’m feeling awesome—until I realize that she’s on her phone the entire time, live Tweeting the entire experience, making fun of me with every thrust to her 10,000 followers.” — Jared, 26

9. “I’m a twin and ever since my sister and I turned 16, guys have always taunted us about doing sex stuff. I guess the twin thing is a real fetish for some people. In my last dirty dream, my sister and I were out at the bar and some guy offered us each $500 to make out in front of everyone. We accepted the dare since we both needed the money, but as soon as we go for it, my face hits a mirror and I wake up, totally disgusted with myself.” — Samantha, 22

10. “I’m back in high school and the girl of my dreams, Kate, this knockout theater chick who always wore braids on Wednesdays, randomly shows up at my house one summer night around 10pm. She’s clearly bored and has nothing better to do but I don’t care. She drives me to the town pool and tells me to break in so we can skinny dip. Then she makes me strip, and before undressing herself, she promises me a blowjob if I can prove how flexible I am by doing a backbend. I figure it’s worth a shot, but I end up with my head literally stuck inside my ass and she just leans over and smirks as if she knew exactly what would happen and then she runs the hell away, laughing her ass off.” — Bennett, 27 Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Real Sex Stories book cover

Read more writing like this in Mélanie Berliet’s book Real Sex Stories That Will Make You Really Horny here.

I am a naughty forest nymph.

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