Thought Catalog

What It Feels Like To Get Your D Sucked

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Many of my girlfriends have asked me the question, “What does it feel like to receive a blowjob?” They tell me that they yearn for a penis just so they can experience it themselves. I, for one, understand this completely. I can’t imagine clocking in countless blowjob hours without a guarantee that you’re going to get yours. I like giving them mostly because I like penis. As a gay man, it’s sort of in my job description. But I’m not sure how pumped I would be if a blowjob wasn’t promised to me in return (unless of course, I loved the dude and we were in a relationship. Then you don’t keep score.)

But even though you should return the favor, it doesn’t mean you’re going to want to, especially if you’re with someone you don’t care about. And that’s okay! Because above all else,  giving a blowjob is exhausting. I’m not just saying that to be cute because oh my god, they don’t call it blowJOB for nothing, right?! No. I’m just saying that giving someone a blowjob is an amazing gift. It’s better than paying for dinner at Buca di Beppo, it’s better than filling someone’s gas tank up, it’s better than paying for the movie and popcorn. It’s  “Let me move my mouth up and down on something jarring while using both of my hands feverishly. Let me sweat in really unattractive ways and be in a really vulnerable position.”  Even though blowjobs are less intimate than something like anal sex, they’re still a sexual act that requires trust and understanding. Like you could be really bad at giving head (it’s really hard) and you want to make sure you’re with someone who won’t judge you. You want to be with someone who’s willing to correct years of bad technique because they care! (Unless it’s a one night stand type of situation. Then there’s no need for the Sting and Trudie Styler kind of communication. Just do your thing, let him do your thing, and get out.)

You know what’s the worst? When you’re giving head and someone pushes your head down further so you choke on their dick. It’s like, “Can you not? I know you want to feel like you have a huge penis right now but it really hurts and makes me feel degraded. So cut it out!” I always get uncomfortable when someone’s going down on me and I look up and they’re staring at me dead in the eye. I know it’s supposed to be sexy or whatever, but it just kind of freaks me out.

Oh, right. I guess I should finally get to the whole “what it feels like to get your dick sucked” part of this article. I’m sorry, I didn’t know I had so many feelings regarding this subject. OK, so getting your dick sucked can feel one of three ways: Amazing, painful or like nothing at all. Seriously. I once was with someone ages ago who would go down on me and it would feel like air. I would have to check to see what he was doing down there because it felt like nothing was happening. In a way, I guess this is a good thing. If someone’s bad at giving head, it’s best that it feels like nothing rather than painful hell. But it still weirded me out. How can you put a mouth on a penis and have nothing happen??!!

The best part of a blowjob for me is not when they’re going down on me, but when they come up for air and start jacking you off. They’ve lubricated your dick so well with their mouth that it’s created a pleasurable waterslide (BTW, too much saliva is a bad thing. I once was with someone who drowned my penis and it made my dick so sensitive that I would have spasms if he touched it. Quell embarrassing!) Anyway, the moment a guy comes up and starts jacking me off, it feels amazing. Kind of like I’m going to pop/explode/whatever. The actual sensation of a mouth on your penis feels exactly like how you would think. However, it’s the mixture of saliva and what you do with your hands that makes it go off the charts.

One thing you should know about how it feels to get your D sucked? It’s a fine line between pleasure and crippling anxiety. As you may know, all men aren’t created equal. Some take 5 minutes to cum (bummer) and some take 30 (exhausting bummer). If a dude is taking too long, it’s kind of crazy how mental he can become. He feels terrible that you’re working so hard and there’s still no orgasm at the end of the blowjob tunnel. Of course this anxiety makes it impossible for him to cum, and then it becomes a blowjob aborted. With most sex stuff, most of it is all mental.

Blowjobs are fun. Blowjobs are stressful. Blowjobs are major work. Blowjobs are the kindest gesture. But they’re really not all that complicated. In fact, I would kill to know what it feels like to get eaten out. Or just what it feels like to have a vagina in general. Feel free to submit a companion piece to ryan@thoughtcatalog.com TC mark

image – Mfajardo

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    • Mr. White

      I'm a heterosexual male and I got aroused by this.
      Oh well.

      • PERFECTCIRCLES

        Let's explore things beyond that heterosexuality.

        • riles

          heh

    • blake

      lol yes, so spot-on. it can be such a tiring task sometimes.

    • Alli

      DAMN, Girl – i'm a female & i'm impressed – you covered it!!
      But i still cannot believe you posted this – aaahahaha – you go! :)

    • asdfghjkl;

      Yes it is funny how you hold on to your intellect during sex

    • TRUMAN

      I don't like getting blowjobs.

      THERE! I SAID IT!

      • IDONTLIKEGIVINGTHEM

        dreamboy

    • prettypetty

      I have always wondered this. I asked my boyfriend once and he was like “Uhhh…just, really good. Like…” then he looked at me emphatically. “Really good.” It wasn't too illuminating.

      As always, Ryan, you are da best.

    • https://twitter.com/#!/nvvmxac danne rassle

      a bad blow job should be jail time

    • Brononymous

      Ryan is why I read Thought Catalog. <3 u bb

    • HotShotMotu

      some men can take about an hour too to ejaculate at least it took me, the first and only time i got it :-/ (though that girl will be giving me more maybe just cos she loves me :) )

    • Guest

      what does “quell embarassing!” mean?

      • Frank TJ Mackie

        how embarrassing!

      • Sdf

        he means 'quel' embarrassing, which is franglais for 'how embarrassing'

    • Mr. White

      I’m a heterosexual male and I got aroused by this.
      Oh well.

    • Gigi

      ” If a dude is taking too long, it’s kind of crazy how mental he can become. He feels terrible that you’re working so hard and there’s still no orgasm at the end of the blowjob tunnel. Of course this anxiety makes it impossible for him to cum, and then it becomes a blowjob aborted. “

      This is what any kind of sex is like for girls, all the time.

      • skankville

        Not for all girls.

    • Lyss

      I LOVE giving head. And my man says his favorite part is the tight grip I get around his D while making zig zag patterns on the shaft with my tongue. God I love giving head.

    • mhm

      i love giving blow jobs :) hehe but its so nice when a guy acknowledges your hard work, either by saying thank you and meaning it, or telling you how good you were, or returning the favor and loving it, or just lying there in euphoric exhaustion with a smile on his face…

      anyway lovee this article :)

      • Anaj0585

        Yeah… It feels good when they tell you ur good at it… Better yet… Awesome!! This guy I’m seeing, first, gave me an 8 (’cause I told him I could be better at it) then a 15, then a 20… Lol! He loves my BJs ;)

    • mantaray

      Then how does one, in fact, give a proper bj?

    • http://profiles.google.com/rosebudmeza Rose Meza

      lolz at IDONTLIKEGIVINGTHEM

      I feel the same Ryan, I like giving them BUT hate the whole, “choke on mah dick beaotch!” thing, it's rather annoying.

    • http://exitclov.tumblr.com exitclov

      I too find it incredulous that one can put mouth on dick and have nothing happen, but I've definitely had that experience with my clit. I'd say 7 times out of 10, it's like the guy might as well be repeatedly licking my thigh.

    • estef

      I especially don't like it when i'm told to “suck that dick” while syphoning cum already. Redundant much?

    • cristina

      can't wait for the companion piece :D

    • Chris

      OMG Ryan you are the best! I liked the article about getting fucked in the ass better 'cause I found it more deep (pun intended), but this one is good too! And you're so right. I hate the choking and I hate it when they don't return the favor. AND I FUCKING HATE IT WHEN THEY MAKE ME SWALLOW. That's MY decision. Oh well.

    • Guest

      you should do an article in rimming next

    • IloveD :)

      So happy to hear that going up for air and what follows is sexeee!! Also, goood yeah, wtf is “choke on it” about?!?!

      • Bryantcharlie

        choking on a dick

    • gbread

      As someone who quite enjoys giving them, I disagree that blowjobs are exhausting; I've felt that way maybe twice in my life, I guess I'm lucky.
      I also like it when a guy pushes me down on his dick and makes me choke a bit.
      (Just saying, everybody is different)
      I also don't expect reciprocation, mostly because I find giving head more satisfying than getting it.
      If your man is taking too long to cum, try to avoid all the things that you think would upset you and DON'T do them (like looking disappointed, frustrated, or texting your friend with your free hand). Be understanding. You don't have to schedule your blowjobs in a continuous block, you can take a break with other sexy things or just a break entirely and then you can go back to sucking more dick when you're both relaxed, if you so desire. I was too impatient for my boyfriend to review my skills, so early on in our relationship I would ask a lot of questions about sex, which he initially found odd (because there's nothing people hate more than communicating about important things, like relationships and sex) but then he was very grateful.

    • Patrick

      This article still doesn’t really say what it’s like. There’s little more here than “amazing” or “It’s good when it’s like this”. “Anxiety” isn’t what a blowjob feels like, just like “love” or even “lust” isn’t what sex feels like.

    • Patrick

      This article still doesn’t really say what it’s like. There’s little more here than “amazing” or “It’s good when it’s like this”. “Anxiety” isn’t what a blowjob feels like, just like “love” or even “lust” isn’t what sex feels like.

      • Anonymous

        Good point, you pretty much summed it up.

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