The Unedited Truth About Choosing Yourself

I am a firm believer in choosing yourself when faced with any kind of rejection. I’m a firm believer that some moments require you to walk away and choose yourself first or save your pride or put your foot down when someone is unfairly attacking you or mistreating you but the truth is choosing yourself is not an easy task, it’s not an easy job and it’s not something you master overnight.

Choosing yourself requires discipline. You have to commit to your word, to your decision, to your choice even in your weakest moments. You can’t call someone who hurt you even if you miss them. You can’t ask someone who betrayed you for help. You can’t work for someone who doesn’t respect you. You can’t befriend someone who thinks you’re not good enough and the list goes on. The truth is choosing yourself is often a very dark and lonely road and that’s why not everyone takes that drive.

Because choosing yourself doesn’t mean going to spas, traveling the world and buying yourself fancy things. It doesn’t mean working out and eating healthy and looking polished all the time, these are just the icing on top of the cake, but the real work is in the batter. It’s in what it takes every day for you to become that person. It’s resisting the temptations, the emotions, the loneliness and the urge to fall back and chase whatever you’re supposed to stay away from. It’s saying no when you want to say yes. It’s letting go of things and people you truly need. It’s seeing people you miss but not saying a word. It’s staying in your lane when everyone else is making a U-turn.

Choosing yourself means choosing your future over your present, your pride over your feelings, your wellbeing over your desires and choosing temporary dissatisfaction over instant gratification. But trust me, if you commit to doing that, if you can truly resist these temptations and survive the ugly, lonely moments when it feels like choosing yourself is doing you more harm than good, you will prevail and you will be thankful that you stuck to that decision because after that storm, you will find the rainbow.

When you meet someone else who appreciates you and chooses you the way you choose yourself, when you finally find the right job with a boss and colleagues who value you and your work, when you make new likeminded friends who don’t belittle you or hold your weaknesses against you and when you truly feel alive and content with who you are. When you look back and realize that the person you are now is worth all the things and relationships you sacrificed and when you realize that all the boundaries you set protected you from ruining your own life.

Your time is precious and it’s your duty to make sure you don’t waste it on the wrong people or the wrong places. It’s your duty to choose yourself because if you wait for people to choose you, you will be waiting a very long time and you may never get chosen.

About the author

Rania Naim

Writing makes me feel alive. Words heal me.