I Still Remember How It All Started But I’ll Never Forget How It All Ended


I still remember the first time we met and the way you made me smile. But I’ll never forget the nights you made me cry and the nights you walked away.

I still remember how your text or your call would turn a horrible day into bliss and I still remember how I envisioned that all my days will be brighter with you. But I’ll never forget the happiness you stole away from me on some nights, and the nights that were darker because of you and the nights I couldn’t sleep from my tears.

I still remember the way you looked at me when I was all you could ever see and all you wanted and I still remember the words you whispered when no one else was around and the promises that made me look forward to a lifetime with you. But I’ll never forget the way your eyes changed, the way they wandered when I was with you, the way they were distracted, the way they were confused and I’ll never forget how you slowly started to break every promise and how you kept taking back all your words.

I still remember the night I held you in my arms when you were aching and how you told me not to let go and I promised you I’ll stay as long as you want me to. But I’ll never forget the nights I needed you and you weren’t there and the summer nights that turned cold with you.

I still remember the time you almost proposed and told me that I’m the one for you and I still remember how I always thought that my son will have your smile and my daughter will have your eyes. But I’ll never forget how you made me feel invisible, how you got so caught up in your life and your priorities that suddenly family was not on your list anymore and suddenly I was not on your list anymore.

I still remember how you gave me a new meaning for family and how you told me that we can redefine it for ourselves; that we can forget what we witnessed with our parents and teach our kids how it should be. But I’ll never forget how you slowly turned into the man you said you’ll never be, how you became indifferent, how you became passionless and unattached and how you made me even more fearful to start my own family.

I still remember the sweet times and the moments when we were in love but I’ll never forget the pain and the moments we ripped each other apart.

I guess you will always be my first love and my first heartbreak and I guess the love that makes us smile is the same love that makes us cry.

I still remember how I said I’ll always come back to you but I’ll never forget that I promised myself not to ever look back once I walk away.  Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Rania Naim

Writing makes me feel alive. Words heal me.

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