As I find myself in the most trying of times, I simultaneously find my mind wandering to places it has never been before. I find my heart feeling things foreign to its natural, thriving habitat. The fear of having to dig deeper into what really makes me happy has finally set in. I find myself looking back on old photos of when life seemed simpler. Wishing I wasn’t thinking so much about something that seems invisible.
The unknowing transition phase into a new chapter of my life was never shown to me by anyone, no one warned me of this strange conundrum. It came in like a freight train with no signs of stopping. The end of this feeling never seemed near- until I came to a mental crossroads. A realization that I am not wrong for questioning everything and wanting the best for myself. Craving happiness and simplicity does not need to be compromised.
This feeling is simply a reminder of how much I am capable of discovering within myself. My inner magic was also a freight train with no signs of stopping. Pain, happiness, sadness, joy, fear- they are all a display of the light inside of me. In all of us. Sometimes it’s hard to remember what is truly important in life. The difficulties we face on our own are not isolated. Everyone goes through this; some are just more vocal than others. So, let me be the voice that says what needs to be heard by those who are feeling lost- you are not alone. Don’t be afraid to dig deep and discover what comes next in your life. Try new things, explore, meet new people, connect deeper with your loved ones. We are conditioned to believe that these feelings of doubt are a sign of weakness. On the contrary. They are signs of strength, moving forward, and change. Embrace it, you’ll never know what you may find.