1. I stopped writing about you. You used to be my Muse, but I just wasn’t inspired anymore. It didn’t seem like a big deal at the time.
2. You stopped making me coffee in the morning. You forgot you were supposed to pick me up after work. You stopped telling me when you were busy. I stopped expecting things from you.
3. You started picking fights. Everything I did was wrong, wrong, wrong. Even the things you used to be proud of. Even the things you used to love. Eventually, I stopped fighting back.
4. I stopped telling you things. When you didn’t know about something, we couldn’t fight about it. I got a strange thrill out of keeping secrets, even if they were just small ones. Stupid ones. My stomach always dropped when you’d look at me, betrayed, when you found out about them anyway.
5. You grew distant. So did I. Sometimes we’d go days without saying anything at all. It felt like there was something hiding in that silence, but I was never able to put my finger on it. I think there are some things I’ll never be able to describe in words.
6. We stopped talking altogether. We never verbally agreed on it, but it just happened. For once, there was something we didn’t have to fight about.
7. You started seeing someone else. I was heartbroken. It’s funny how you can intellectually know that something is over and yet still, deep down, you can’t make yourself believe it.
8. You still reached out to me. I still responded. I no longer knew how to cut you out, even though it had been so easy before. I started wondering why we stopped seeing each other in the first place. I’d like to think I have selective memory.
9. You always talked about her and I had to pretend like it didn’t hurt. But god, it hurt, like nothing I’d ever known before. I told myself if I could endure it now, it would get better. It didn’t.
10. I grew angry. About everything. Anything, really. I don’t know where it came from but suddenly every time you said something, I just wanted to scream in response. Maybe that’s what hurt manifests into when you can’t handle the pain anymore.
11. I stopped answering your texts. I ignored your calls. I made halfhearted excuses when I saw you, but I knew you didn’t believe me.
12. I started talking to other guys. They weren’t you, but I started to realize I didn’t care.
13. I started writing about you. It turned out the best way to get over you was to let it all spill out.