Dating An Independent Girl

17 Dating Habits Of An Extremely Independent Woman

1. She’s never sitting around, waiting for you to call. She’s got too much to do and too much to think about outside of her dating life.

2. Rather, she’s confident enough and comfortable enough with herself to know that if you like her, and you’ve got balls, you will call her. If you don’t, oh well. It wasn’t meant to be and she’ll be happier with someone else.

3. At the same time, if she likes you and she feels like talking to you, she’ll call whenever she damn well pleases. She’s got a busy life and a lot going on, so if she likes you enough, she has no problem with using one of her rare spare moments to talk to you.

4. If planning a date and figuring out a time is more complicated than planning a bank robbery, or if you have to “take a rain check” on multiple occasions, she’s going to get over it real fast. There are plenty of other fish in the sea, and having to waste energy on someone who cancels all the time is not worth it.

5. She’s extremely self-aware. She knows that being independent and self-sufficient doesn’t mean she lacks emotions or feelings. It just means that she’s got a fast-moving life and she’s not afraid of waving away someone who’s just bringing nonsense or negativity into her life.

6. She’s not looking for someone to support her financially. She’s looking for someone who’s going to support her emotionally and mentally. She wants support in life and in whatever it is that she’s trying to do.

7. …And when she thinks she’s found someone like that, she’s just as ready to share her own support and encouragement with them.

8. She’s not into the Hollywood movie stereotype of the cutthroat career woman who becomes soft and loving the minute a man enters into her life and rescues her.

9. Instead, an independent woman just thinks of herself as someone who is ambitious, hard-working, and self-sustaining. She’s not looking for a man to sweep in and save her from this life. She loves this life. She’s just looking for someone who’s going to balance her out, stand as her equal, and allow her to share the life she’s built up for herself.

10. An independent woman knows that she doesn’t have to be crazily successful and wealthy to be considered independent and to feel independent. All she needs is to feel comfortable in her own skin, to know how to provide for herself, and to have passions and interests and projects that exist outside of her dating life.

11. …But she’s not against dating. She doesn’t hate men. She loves dating. She enjoys romance. She wants to find someone and share her life with them. She just knows how to balance it out with other things in order to keep herself feeling fulfilled and happy.

12. An independent woman will not play games with you. Not because she thinks she’s better than you or because she is too good for games. She just finds playing games to be boring and a waste of time. She’s used to being upfront about who she is and what she wants, so playing games is not something that comes naturally to her.

13. She is not concerned with petty drama. Maybe she was, at some point, because enjoying drama is just a natural part of being a teenager and growing up. But at this point in her life, she doesn’t need drama. She has enough going on to keep her entertained, and too many other things that she’s curious about to get caught up in unimportant drama.

14. Being self-sufficient and independent is not equivalent to being high-strung. She’s just as happy to spend a night in her pajamas with you as she is to go out to a nice dinner date. If she likes you, she doesn’t care about what she should be doing and what kind of dates she should be going on. She’ll do whatever she wants, because as long as she is having fun with you, it doesn’t matter.

15. She doesn’t nag you, but she does expect you to put forth your best self.

16. …And she will not apologize for that.

17. She doesn’t believe that she’s always right, but she does believe she has a right to her own opinions. She knows that she makes mistakes and is not correct in everything that she says. But she will not apologize for having something to say. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Kim Quindlen

I’m a staff writer for Thought Catalog. I like comedy and improv. I live in Chicago. My Uber rating is just okay.