If You’re Thinking About The Ones You Used To Love, Remember This

Maybe you find yourself thinking about all the loves you’ve had in this life — the ones you had to let go of in order to grow, the ones who held you back from growing, the ones who broke you in ways you didn’t think was possible, the ones who spent more time ruining you than loving you. 

You think of the one with the laugh and how badly you wish you could hear it now, especially on the days you need some light. You daydream about the one who you talked for hours with about the new book you’re reading or some of your favorite songs. You wonder about the one with the addictions, if he’s doing okay now and if he’s thinking of you too. 

You look back on all the small moments you shared with them: the softness to their eyes looking at you in the morning, the way they would stretch their limbs out to kiss you good morningYou think about the coffee they made for you or the bottles of wine you shared, the movies you used to watch together, the songs you used to sing in the shower with lyrics that hit a little too close to home. 

If you find yourself thinking about the old loves you’ve had in your life, let yourself feel whatever it is you feel. Don’t push away thoughts of them. It’s okay to think about them from time to time. 

They were someone important to you at one point in this life, someone who you once shared beautiful moments with, someone who made you who you are today — and that is something to be grateful for.

But please, don’t get lost in that thinking — the what-ifs. It’s okay to miss them. It’s okay to miss what you shared with them. Whatever you’re thinking of — just don’t let it consume you. Don’t let these thoughts take control of your feelings. Don’t second guess where you are right now or who you’re with or if you made the right decision.

Think of these old loves as people who you were meant to know and love at one point in time, but that’s it. Think of your old loves as what they are — old loves. They are in the past for a reason. Remember that.

Brooklyn-based poet, writer, avid coffee drinker, and music lover.

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