1. They don’t make you compromise yourself. There is literally no use being with someone who requires you to shrink yourself or your life down in order for them to fit into it. Hard pass on that person.
2. Your insecurities don’t have any breeding ground. Everyone feels insecure, but if the person you’re dating gives you reason to multiply your insecurities, they need to go immediately. Nobody has time to be with someone who makes them feel worse about themselves.
3. You feel more you with them than you do with most people. Whatever you’ve got going on is exactly what they’re into and neither of you are mad about it at all.
4. They don’t love you in spite of your flaws, no. They actually don’t spend a lot of time thinking about your flaws because they are not a monster of a person who’s fixated on all the things they have to love you in spite of.
5. You don’t feel as though they’re dating you for your potential. They’re pretty chill and stoked on you as you are right now whether or not you change in the future.
6. They are fired the hell up about the things that make you excited. You’re probably really weird and into some weird shit, like we all are. They’re fired up about that same weird shit.
7. You hate the same stuff or people in common. Those who hate together… stay together?
8. You know how to fight. Arguments are inevitable when you’re trying to smush your life up against someone else’s life, but you two don’t resort to the lowest of blows even when you’re, like, really really really really really mad. (Which is impressive tbh.)
9. You can actually, truly, really, for real be honest with them. They don’t just listen when you try to communicate, but the lines are open all the time. Sorry, but you have no time for someone who refuses to talk about mature grown-ass shit. You know you’re better than that.
10. You don’t have to make excuses for them. They own their decisions and take responsibility for their own lives. Your relationship is a coupling of two independent people coming together to see what love can do. (Awwwwwww.)
11. You are able to be honest with yourself versus pretending everything is perfect all the time. This love shit’s hard sometimes. Someone who’s worth the effort will actually acknowledge that and share the burden with you.
12. I don’t know, man, you just know where you fucking stand and you’re not constantly feeling insecure and you’re pretty sure they like you the same amount that you like them and you’re clear on both your intentions and the sex is good and the hanging out when not having sex is great and you just feel a little like maybe it’s too good to be true and then you have a fight and it’s like LOL definitely not too good to be true, but just good enough that you know this person is worth getting to know and loving and spending time with. And it’s passionate, but not in a stop-your-life kind of way, but in a sustainable way. And it’s just fun. You guys have a lot of fun together and talk through the hard shit and watch things you both like and do things together and eat pizza sometimes. It’s pretty great. Hold onto them. They’re good people.