Thought Catalog

What It’s Really Like To Be An Alcoholic

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You’re 16 and hanging out with your buddies at a friend’s trailer because his dad’s out of town and you decide you’re gonna get f-cked up, so you drink a six-pack of beer in under a half-hour. The last things you remember are sitting down to take a crap then your buddies laughing you awake when you pass out with your pants around your ankles. The next day, along with your hangover come stories about all the hilarity you caused during your blackout. How you spelled “F-ck You” with your piss on the driveway of some chick who dissed you. How you told the waitress at the diner downtown to go to hell when she told your friends to get your drunk ass out of there before she called the cops. Man, what fun times you laugh over! That’s one way this whole thing starts, when you’re a teenager, and you think that getting totally smashed is both fun and funny.

But it doesn’t stay that way. Because the good times roll over into college. The parties blur together: nights stumbling home down the hills of a darkly lit desert city. Finding that your friends, in your drunken stupor, had taken markers to your face and drew cocks aimed at your mouth and epithets usually found on bathroom stall walls scribbled on your forehead. You have no idea how long they were there before you now see them in the mirror. Then the rest of your 20s roll by, where you’ve worked up to beers with sidecars, and remember that time you almost went to jail when you choked that racist up against the bar wall for saying that he thought white people were superior to blacks? Sober, you’d have walked away, disgusted someone had said that, knowing you were smarter, and perhaps pitying the person who thought so small. But drunk, you fell to violence. And you find yourself in your 30s, and you obsess over some startling new symptoms, those of the alcoholic.

Example: An alcoholic gets emotional: angry, sentimental, happy, etcetera. Those emotions emit via diatribes that don’t make sense, like when I got upset at my family because — from my drunk perspective — they didn’t care about the “state of world affairs” and were content to go on living their blissfully ignorant lives, la la la. Did I tell you that this occurred one year on Christmas night? I called my mom a bitch when she told me to shut up already. I threw up in my sister’s kitchen sink. The next morning I apologized to everyone, but this kind of damage goes unrepaired, really.

It is, at times, very painful to be an alcoholic. You get muscle cramps. Alcohol dehydrates the drinker and interferes with the delivery of electrolytes to muscles. On top of this, I’m a jogger, and I live in Atlanta, and muscle overexertion in hot weather contributes to these painful spasms. For me, they usually manifest in the hamstrings and calves, and they almost always happen sometime in the middle of the night. It’s like someone has tied a string around one end of a muscle without my knowing it, and then they give it a yank and hold the string taught. It hurts like hell. The other night I had a severe cramp while sleeping in a tent (I was camping). The only way to end a cramp and the pain is to leap from bed and get weight on my leg. That’s not so easy to do when you’re wrapped in a sleeping bag on the ground in the woods. So I just lay there and grunted and screamed until I woke my wife and there was nothing to be done but wait painfully for it to pass, which took five excruciating minutes.

You also get these strange muscular and nerve problems, like when you’re sleeping you get the pins and needles in your hands and arms. Yeah, lots of people get this, but your case is different, because it happens pretty much every night. You’ve figured out ways to sleep that help to prevent this, like when sleeping on your stomach you tuck one hand under your head and the other under your chest/belly, and this alternating arm position seems to reduce the symptoms. But you have other issues. Ever have the strange, involuntary and sudden sensation that you’re falling? You get this almost every night, out of nowhere, and it startles you awake, which can contribute to the insomnia (covered below).

Alcohol withdrawal sucks. Your blood pressure spikes, and if you’re me you can actually feel it. It’s like the blood pumping up my carotid artery and into my brain vibrates against my skull so I hear the pulses in my ears and they won’t go away. You get night sweats. You have insomnia, because you’ve relied on alcohol to put yourself to sleep and either voluntarily or not you’ve now deprived yourself of your “sedative.” You lay awake reading and writing. This is excellent for your productivity, but not so good for getting to work the next day after a sleepless night.

Night terrors: these aren’t nightmares, as you don’t achieve REM sleep. That’s because, as previously mentioned, you cannot sleep. But you sometimes do get into a weird half-awake/half-asleep state in which you think you can see everything in the room in which you lie. The details are extraordinary. There’s the television, the coffee table, the remote. You feel the fabric of the couch beneath you. But you cannot move. You’re paralyzed. And what’s more awful is that you hear the footsteps (someone’s, but whose?) approaching from behind. Then you feel whoever that is touching your shoulder, pushing against you. You’re so goddamn scared because you cannot see who or what this is because you cannot move to see the person or to make him stop, or to get away, or to fight back. Then your eyes snap open to the living room, empty except for you laying there. You return to your book, the lines of prose running by like armies marching east. When you doze, repeat at this paragraph’s beginning. The process continues till morning.

In general, long-term alcohol abuse causes high blood pressure. You retain water because the alcohol constantly depletes your system of it, even as you take in excessive amounts of water because you prefer beer, which is composed mostly of that life-giving compound. Still, your body tries to flush the poison ethanol from your system. Add to this the fact that often alcoholics spend inordinate time in bars and thus dine on bar foods loaded with salt that also contributes to water retention. All this water in all of your cells, including your red blood cells, causes the hypertension your doctor diagnoses you with and for which he prescribes Lisinopril, and tells you to cut out salts, change your diet, and lose weight. He doesn’t question your alcohol intake because about this you have lied, saying you only have about 10 drinks per week. One time you even tried to stick to that and successfully did so for almost a week prior to a doctor’s appointment. At that appointment, when your doctor asked, and you truthfully (for that one-week period, at least) responded with the ten number, he said, That’s not too bad. And with your confidence you explained that those 10 came all on the weekend, that you didn’t have one drink all week long. That was when your doctor’s eyebrows raised and he looked at you incredulously, saying, “10 drinks in one weekend?” And you did not have the strength to explain that most of the time 10 drinks in one night are barely enough to get you buzzed.

Back to the sleep problems, because, since you’re an alcoholic your alcohol tolerance is incredible. So, yet another thing that you and your friends thought was cool when you were younger, but turns out not to be cool later in life, is the fact that you can drink, and drink, and drink. In fact, a 12-pack of beer, a couple cocktails, and a few glasses of wine are sometimes merely enough to get you only a little buzzed. When you were young, people would gather at parties to watch you imbibe and exclaim, How does he keep on drinking without getting drunk or sick? This was your training ground. Later, you’ll visit Russia, the world’s drunkest country, where the men with whom you drink will tell your wife that in the future you can return to drink with them without your Russian-speaking wife to accompany you. Never mind that, likely, due to Russian men’s propensity to die very young due to alcohol-related issues, these guys won’t be alive by the time you get a chance to do that, and never mind the chances that you’ll be alive. Still, you amazed them with your drinking, as their red faces gazed on yours and they spit their das and spiceebas to you and to each other. Even when you’re not in Russia, on days when you’ll decide that you want to get your drinking done, you’ll start early, around noon, publicly, at the bar up the street. You’ll drink beer. You’ll work while you drink, typing away on this laptop. Later in the afternoon you’ll order a Maker’s Mark neat, and then you’ll order another. That’s usually enough to make you feel just all right. After you get home, you’ll continue drinking. There’s no telling how many drinks you’ll consume on these days. 20? 25? Either way, you’ll go to bed relaxed, but not drunk. You’ll think you could even operate a motor vehicle, and in many cases you have done so. You realize how idiotic and irresponsible this is, but that will be the next morning. And this, all this you drink, is so that you can sleep.

Diarrhea. You’ll rarely ever poop solid. Sorry, yes this is gross, but it’s the truth. See, because alcohol inflames your lower intestine and inhibits water reuptake via your bowels, you’ll poop watery stools regularly. Also, your pancreas is f-cked up and inflamed from the alcohol use. The enzymes the pancreas normally secretes in order to help digest food don’t get where they need to go in the stomach, so all that nutrition you’re supposed to get doesn’t end up in your body as it passes in that watery stool, wasted, like your body, which is wasting away. The other thing that sucks about this is the diarrhea splatters that have to be cleaned off the underside of your toilet seat and in your toilet bowl, if you ever anticipate company. And it’s not like you can just do this once a week or something. You pretty much have to clean up after every movement, the likes of which can sometimes top six a day because, well, you probably already know what having diarrhea’s like. Imagine this being a 365-days-per-year kind of thing.

Another thing that sucks is trying to find drinking time. Unfortunately, most people, myself included, are fairly responsible, have jobs and families, and work hard to maintain the personal and professional relationships that help perpetuate these scenarios. Because such work has to be put into such relationships, necessarily that time has not been diverted to drinking. But, if you’re an alcoholic (and don’t go fooling yourself thinking that only true alcoholics are the people who are f-cked up down at the park, in the ragged clothing, homeless, with the red wrinkled faces) then a good portion of your thinking per day goes into how you will get your drink on. You’ll think things like, if I go to the bar today, then I won’t get the emissions test done on the car, but I could get that done tomorrow. I mean, the registration’s already expired, so what does one more day matter? You’ll think: my wife leaves work at 5:30 p.m., so if I’ve got time after I’ve finished teaching, I can stop by the bar for a beer and a shot, then go to the grocery store to pick up the “casual” beers I’ll drink with dinner, then, after the wife goes to bed I’ll have the cocktails that are waiting for me, sitting in the liquor bottles in the cabinet at home. For at least a little while every day you’ll think about that story you’re working on and the sentences that accompany it, and rarely you’ll have great spurts during which you’ll write insatiably. All this creates an air of efficiency and productivity which is really a ruse for the one thing that you actually accomplish with any regularity and that is drinking.

The good news is that there are millions of people like you! Most people can’t fess up to the fact of their alcohol abuse. Your own family is this way: they can’t admit that there’s a history of alcoholism on both your father’s and your mother’s sides, nor can they accept it when you tell them that you have a drinking problem. They say, You have a job! You’re responsible! However, you have at least accepted the truth and you’re able to at look yourself. Hence the sleepless nights: because I try so hard to not drink so much. I’ve learned that if I wean myself from a bender by cutting down the amount I drink every day I can alleviate the withdrawal symptoms and get at least a little sleep. I’ve learned to enjoy beer, wine, and cocktails with food and to not get totally wasted all the time. I’m not a believer in 12-step programs, because no god — or gods — has anything to do with my addiction, and I believe that that addiction is a curable disease. To that end, I’ve learned to not go on benders. I poop solids! My health has returned and the doctor says I might go off the blood pressure meds. I tell myself the truth daily. I write essays about the truth about myself! I keep telling myself: This is evidence that you’re more productive with your work. What’s left to work on is watching your children grow into adults. And you’re working in that direction. That’s all you need to tell yourself. Tell yourself this every day: that you’re working so goddamn hard. TC mark

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  • EEH

    I appreciate and am scared at this. My boyfriend is an alcoholic, but won’t admit it. I’ve started attending al-anon to get help. Alcoholism is a scary addiction. :(

    • em

      My boyfriend is an alcoholic too. After I go to sleep, he’ll sneak vodka until the early hours of the morning. It breaks my heart because it’s such a terrible addiction and as well it hurts my feelings as if he can’t be around me sober. Al-anon helps those close to the alcoholics as well? I may need to check this out.

      • Cassandra

        Al-Anon is different than AA–it’s specifically for families and friends of alcoholics.

        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Al-Anon/Alateen

        It’s definitely meant to help support those close to alcoholics. See if there’s one in your area… I’m sure it’ll help.

  • vr

    Yikes

  • jessica

    you’re an idiot, your ego is out of control and it will only be a matter of time before you go off the deep end again…get help….and stop writing so much bullshit on how you don’t need help…thanks

    • lucy

      ugh shut up

    • http://rossgardinerblog.wordpress.com rossgardinersblog

      Yeah, I’m with Lucy here. Shut up. That was a really interesting piece. Thanks for sharing that!

    • Scarlett

      really? this guy who seems to have got his life together, or at least is starting to, you seem to shoot him down?

      you’re a real nice girl jessica.

    • H

      Troll!

    • https://thoughtcatalog.com/ Oliver Miller

      I would also like to say this: shut up, Jessica.

    • Bobby

      Stop being such a downer.

  • Jess

    I’m an atheist in a 12-step program. It can really help, and you can do it on your terms. Don’t let the “God” thing scare you off. And I know for a fact Atlanta has some great resources for support.

    • Jess

      that being said, I really appreciate you being completely candid.

  • Lily

    I’m curious how many alcoholics will actually relate and share this with their friends and family. I’m also very confused about the comment from Jessica. Very unnecessary and pointless, not to mention counter-therapeutic. I hope she will never have to witness any loved one go through addiction as she can obviously barely handle even reading about it on Thought Catalog.

    • Annette

      I agree, that was confusing. There is probably something else there that only she is aware of. Probably needs some venting, I hope she has friends she can do that with because random outbursts on a discussion board sure isn’t going to help.

  • http://www.facebook.com/reeves.tash Natasha Reeves

    Last sentence…

  • http://iamthe0nly.tumblr.com jordana bevan

    do you ever think about how much more of an awesome, happy, respectable, loving, kind person you could be if you didn’t drink? i do

    • http://iamthe0nly.tumblr.com jordana bevan

      as a 20 y/o girl who just decided to quit drinking i wanted to relate to this, but after reading am very, very happy that this didn’t particularly resonate. i’m not happy that i fucked up this bad this early in my life, i’m not happy that i fucked up bad enough that continued alcohol use is out of the question. but at least i’m getting help now. god this was heartbreaking. i’m sorry, jamie.

      • Alyssa

        I’m a girl (now 21) who also quit when I turned 20. Good for you for recognizing that you needed to quit before things got even worse and for getting help. I turned out to be able to drink in moderation (most of the time) after 5 months sober, but I still wonder why I ever went back to drinking. Alcohol dependence really did change me. Through recovery, you are well on your way to being that awesome, happy, respectable, loving, kind person that you want to be. Enjoy that person :)

  • Meg

    Hmmmmm. Mixed emotions about this. My dad who is a recovering alcoholic of 20 years has always told me, “Nothing good comes of alcohol.” And to this day I can’t think of one thing that alcohol has positively contributed to in my life. Alcohol is a tough one. My friends and fam like to deny the fact that I too have a problem, but I knew in my gut I did/do. I quit drinking 17 days ago. Life looks/feels weird without alcohol and I often find myself wondering how I am going to enjoy life without it….thus reinforcing my gut feeling that I AM an alcoholic. I don’t think non-alcoholics question the quality of their free time without alcohol. It’s a journey I have realized, and a challenge, and a task that has to be conquered daily. Although I have only gone to 1 AA meeting so far, I will say that within that meeting and with the handful of self help books I have read, you can apply the 12 steps in almost any aspect of life and substitute your own “higher power” for God. I wish you peace and luck in your journey. My mixed emotions come from the fact that I was really disappointed to read all the way to the end of this article and find that you seem to still be on the fence. I am not judging as I believe in total and complete self control, I just for a brief second,..got a little bit jealous because I realize for me, it is all or nothing. Thank you for sharing!

  • Craigory

    Stop working so hard.

    I’ve been through almost exactly the same things, but eventually realized that millions of people (atheists/agnostics included) have stopped drinking, one day at a time through 12 step programs.

    6.5 years later, my like is 100% better. It sucks, it’s terrible, it’s not fair, etc. I get it.

    You also aren’t as unique as you think you are.

    • Lily

      I don’t think this writer thought of themselves as unique. If anything, they mention how many “millions of people” don’t admit to themselves (or their doctors) of their addiction. It’s actually that consideration of being normal, unfortunately, that can feed into more addictive behaviors, that there is really ‘nothing wrong’, that they are ‘able to function just like everyone else’… I think to overcome addiction, one needs to consider themselves as unique, as a person with a problem, however, they need great people in their lives to SUPPORT their path sobriety, not condemn it, (as Jessica did above) ((still pissed about that)).

      • Craigory

        (climbing on soapbox…)

        I understand that I am not normal- as does the author, I’m sure. My addiction rears its head through sex, caffeine, food, exercise, people. The bottom line for addicts is that we like to change the way we feel. For the past 6.5 years, I’ve been clean and sober, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t changed how I’ve felt.

        The normalcy I’ve found is a way of living that “millions of people” have found, which is through recovery. I know there are millions more who will never find recovery nor seek it out, and close family members fall into that group for me.

        There is no “overcoming” addiction, there is acknowledging the existence of the disease (it is a disease, not a moral failing or lack of willpower), and action.

        (climbing down soapbox)

    • Marsha

      I agree with you on this one and the one below. Addiction is definitely a chronic disease. I work at a substance abuse clinic and hear about these kinds of stories all the time. Addicts have built-in forgetters. Just because you feel good one day, doesn’t mean you won’t pick up a drink the next. I had a client that was sober for 27 years and then relapsed when he was in his 60s. Congrats on being sober, but you always have to take it one day at a time and surround yourself with sober support.

  • JEN

    in regards to the calve cramps: i get these all the time and this is the quickest way i have found to get them to go away. grab the ball of your foot (you know the top part of your foot by the toes) and pull your foot up towards you. for me, whenever i have cramps my calves are always rock hard and my foot is stuck in the position it would be if you are flexing your calve. pulling the ball of your foot towards you will stretch out your calve and stop the cramp. I hope all of that makes sense and helps you the next time you have those nasty cramps :)

    • Jen

      I can relate to this so much. Also I just wanted to say I think you might be my favorite writer on TC, I always find myself reading and loving whatever you write. Don’t give up.

  • http://www.itmakesmestronger.com/2012/07/what-it%e2%80%99s-really-like-to-be-an-alcoholic-2/ Only L<3Ve @ ItMakesMeStronger.com

    […] Thought Catalog » Life Add a comment […]

  • Annette

    Thanks for this very honest piece. Kind of scared and surprised by what I just read, I kind of feel like someone just kicked me in the face.

  • Brenda

    I’m just happy you spelled out etcetera.

  • crankyteacher

    Reblogged this on Cranky Teacher's Musings and commented:
    My family has no history of alcohol abuse but this resonates with me. I can’t say I understand alcoholism but I understand addiction and this is the reality.

  • Jessica

    Ok perhaps idiot was a strong word, i do appreciate the honesty I guess I was a little put off by reading through the entire drunkologue and not ever getting to the good stuff. I am an addict and alcoholic myself and I’ve been sober for a few years and I guess what I saw was Denail. Stating that the writer could control his own drinking by pure self will after calling himself an alcoholic just seemed contradictory. I worry for the young budding alcoholic and addict that will take this and convince themselves that they should be able to control themselves ” of only I were strong enough” I tried that in the past and it almost killed me, I tried to hol on to my own ideas and the result was negative. Ok so 12 steps isn’t for you, that’s ok but calling the disease of addiction “curable” is not just wrong but kind of irresponsible to the readers. I’m writing on my phone in the Libby of my 12 step yoga class so my spelling and grammar is not perfect but the message is there. It’s only a matter of time before your self will gets you into trouble….good luck and may the force be with you

    • agree

      I agree with you Jessica. Self-will lead me to relapse. I don’t know why everyone is so damn upset by your earlier comment. They probably just don’t understand.

  • Victoria

    This is my ex-boyfriend of 4 years. I begged for him to just reach out for help, let me go with him to counseling or just to admit that he had a problem. I saw this through the eyes of your wife. To be a partner of a raging alcoholic makes them another suffering victim of the disease. I would sit in my car before walking into our home, pleading with whomever controls the universe that he wouldn’t be passed out on the couch again from an all day bender. It got to the point where I was losing myself in the disease and our otherwise unhealthy relationship. Our lives were dictated by his ability to function and need for a drink, and I couldn’t live my life that way. After 4 years of begging and hoping, I left to save myself and still feel like I left him to suffer. I can only hope that he gets helps now, without me to beg but I honestly doubt it. His family is like yours, blissfully ignoring what is directly in front of them, for their own selfish piece of mind. I commend you for admitting your problem, people don’t understand how hard that part can be. I say I admire your wife for the loyalty and commitment that I wasn’t able to sustain. Good luck as you move forward, your words are far more impactful than you know.

  • Anon

    Get help. Im a nurse and have seen too many people destroy their organs (pancreas esp.) slowly and not only NOT see their kids grow up but put them in hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt from medical care after their bodies have shut down. Stop drinking. Eat awesome. Find something that will work to get through the emotional aspects of your addiction. Let your body heal itself. Good luck.

  • http://twitter.com/heronkady10 Kady Heron (@heronkady10)

    Hmmm.. This topic is very interesting!
    Saving Thousands of People Hundreds of Dollars a month. Join the club today. Just click -> http://www.saversclub.us

  • http://rossgardinerblog.wordpress.com rossgardinersblog

    Reblogged this on Away and commented:
    An extremely interesting piece about the power of alcohol.

  • tc comment

    I’ve lived through LITERALLY a family full of alcoholics. My mom, my dad, my sister two years older than me, my grandma, my grandpa, my aunt, my uncle, the list goes on. Some of them recovering, some of them not. I’m lucky that I was not passed down that gene. That being said, I know for a fact that the only thing that has ever helped them was AA.

    For example, my mom was sober 24 some odd years and she relapsed this year. I had never seen her drunk before in my life. I am 19 and she was sober 3 or 4 years before my older sister was even born. I only could tell once when I smelled it on her breath when I came home one night. She had stopped going to meetings and allowed herself to drink non-alcoholic beer, allowed herself to act as if time had made her “not an alcoholic anymore”. I’m sorry but if you’re an alcoholic it’s in your genes. It’s not something that will ever go away. (See: http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/news/20040526/researchers-identify-alcoholism-gene) It’s a part of who you are and it may suck but it’s better to accept it and find some people who can share their experiences so you don’t feel alone. My mom is now sober for over a month after her slip and I cannot only see the change in her lifestyle since she got a sponsor and started going to meetings again, but I can FEEL it. It’s in her aura. I went to a bbq with her at her sponsor’s home and it was such a cool thing to see such an eclectic group of people ranging from young to older gathered together to hang out just because they want to support one another.

    Also, something that is very stressed in AA is not GOD but a higher power. In fact, your higher power could be a door knob for all AA cares. It means admitting that there is something that is more powerful than you, something that is truly out of your control, much like an addicts alcohol usage.

    That is all.

  • Meg

    Thank you for telling the truth. My dad has been an alcoholic sine I can remember (I’m 28) and we have no relationship now because of his addiction. I struggle to find sympathy for him within myself and I can’t seem to forgive him. Your honesty really helps me to see thigs from another point of view. Thank you for being brave.

  • jaystevens137

    Thanks so much for this vignette from your life. Your normal, everyday, millions-of-people-lead-it life. I may not be an alcoholic, but I gain quite a bit from relating to your struggles. Alcoholism may or may not be exactly what we think of as a disease. Maybe a disorder. Maybe something else. It’s a coping mechanism that allows us to forget the things that make us hurt. We can compartmentalize the pain, and work its release into our daily routine without feeling like we’re trying to cover it up.

    Some people use means other than drinking. Sex, drugs, and rock n roll isn’t just a slogan. Some abuse others, physically or emotionally. Some are socially withdrawn, burying themselves in work. Some choose video games, their garage, or other obsessive hobbies. Some have found a way to turn it into a positive and turn to running, yoga, meditation, exercise, gardening, or other productive endeavors. I envy and admire those people.

    One reader was disappointed that it seems you haven’t changed many of your behaviors. That the “end” of your story was a bit of a let down. I say that I appreciate this glimpse of your life, and also how it relates to mine, and maybe others. I appreciate that this isn’t another, “My problem, and how I conquered it” article, written by someone who had just had an epiphany and turned their life around, and how you can too!

    I appreciate that you posted a piece of your struggle for everyone to read and judge and criticize and compare and contrast and belittle and admire. Because not everyone is on the far side of the hill of their success story. Not everyone is at the point where they’re looking back at the hardest thing they overcame in their life and are ready to tell everyone about it. Some people are on the uphill climb, just at the peak of one of many small ascents. And at this point, any victory, however seemingly insignificant, is felt as a victory nonetheless. Right now, for some, seeing the mountain at all and saying that they’re going to get over the whole thing, is one hell of a victory.

  • http://nanakoosasplace.blogspot.com/ Jenny Hazard

    Agreed! I would add that awful day when you wake up and realize that you have two options; drink or don’t drink and that each one is a terrifying as the other.
    Thank you for sharing your story, our story, however many of us are out there.
    Peace,
    Jenny

  • http://mangopeels.wordpress.com quantumtheory

    alcohol is good, so long as you have control over it and not the other way round.
    then it just becomes pathetic

    • http://twocentopinion.wordpress.com twocentopinion

      Would you call a cancer patient pathetic? Alcoholism is a disease. Indeed it is sad and causes alcoholics to do weird, sometimes damaging, things, but it is NOT pathetic. I am aware that it is very hard for normal drinkers to understand alcoholism, but must you be so outwardly ignorant and cruel? If anything here is pathetic, it’s your comment. Cancer patients aren’t pathetic. Diabetics aren’t pathetic. And neither are alcoholics. Educate yourself and grow up.

      • http://mangopeels.wordpress.com quantumtheory

        you cannot compare alcohol addiction to cancer and diabetes.
        And yes, it’s pathetic when you realize what you’ve become after getting addicted, and you realize there was no need to drink so much. FYI, I was an alcoholic. And your opinion is not even worth two cents.

    • Sam

      You’re becoming quite an unpleasant presence on here aren’t you?

  • http://100words100stories100days.wordpress.com thecontradictoryoptimist

    This is the most honest and candid article I have come across on the subject. Thank you for putting it out there. It’s given me a reality check and I know a lot of people who need to read this. We refuse to acknowledge how the occasional beer changing into an almost daily habit is actually the first step to such a deep problem. Where I live this is something that is more rampant with people living alone since “meeting for just 1 drink” becomes the inevitable excuse to meet people.

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