Someone Else Isn’t Going To Fix Your Broken Heart, You Have To Do That Yourself

Girl with a broken heart
God & Man

Pressing your lips against someone new is not going to heal you. Dating someone else, before fully recovering from what happened with the person that came before, is not the answer. You cannot get over someone by getting under someone else.

Jumping into a new relationship may make you feel better temporarily, it may help you distance yourself from your old love, but it is not going to fix your broken heart. You have to do that yourself.

You have to fix your own broken heart by dealing with your pain head-on instead of pretending it is nonexistent. You have to let the memories of your last relationship wash over you — all of the moments of happiness, of sadness, of anger, of regret. You have to let yourself feel every emotion. Don’t run away from the pain. Embrace it. And then let it go.

Let go of the idea that they were the only person meant for you. Let go of the thought of spending the rest of your lives side-by-side. Let go of the notion that maybe, if you play your cards right, they will come running back to you.

You have to fix your own broken heart by taking all of the effort you used to put into the relationship and redirecting that effort toward yourself. Set aside time to have fun, to relax, to pamper yourself. Take care of yourself. Love yourself. Treat yourself the way you wish another person would treat you.

You have to fix your own broken heart by being gentle with yourself, by being a friend instead of an enemy. Don’t beat yourself up over your loss. Don’t blame yourself for everything that happened. Accept that any mistakes you might have made are in your past and decide that it’s time to work toward a brighter future.

You have to fix your own broken heart by finding a reason to get out of bed in the morning, a reason that has little to do with love. Because you have a career you are passionate about. Because you have friends who you are excited to see. Because you have a dog you promised to take on a walk around the block before breakfast.

You have to fix your own broken heart by actually wanting to get over the other person. An addict cannot get clean against their will, and you cannot move on against yours. You have to make the decision to stop listening to sad songs. Stop scrolling through their Instagram feed. Stop torturing yourself with memories of them when you are wide awake at night.

You have to fix your own broken heart by realizing love isn’t the center of your universe. There are other things to think about, aside from who you are going to sleep beside. There are other priorities that need your focus. There are other paths toward self-fulfillment.

You have to fix your own broken heart by staying strong. By remembering that you have options. You have standards. You have a lifetime to find your forever person, so there is no need to rush. TC mark

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