She’s sick of dating, because she knows that she deserves better than the exes and almost loves that have swiped her heart. She knows that she shouldn’t settle for their sad excuses for effort, because there’s something better out there.
But she’s never seen better. She’s never experienced a love that lasts. She’s never dated a boy that refused to send mixed signals and made promises he could actually keep.
She has hope that a superior boy exists, that he’s steps away from finding her, but hope can only take her so far. She wants to finally see results.
She’s tired of the games. She has the guts to be straightforward, to tell boys how she feels and what she expects from them — except those boys don’t see her honesty as a strength. They see it as a weakness, mistaking her courage for clinginess.
She’s a firm believer that hard to get only works in the movies, but at the same time, she feels like she can’t make herself too available or she’ll scare the guy away.
After all, if she texts back too quickly, he’ll ignore her. If she tries to plan a date too early, he’ll bail. If he doesn’t have anything to chase, he’ll get bored.
She can’t wrap her mind around that. Since when did compliments become red flags?
She would love it if a boy admitted that he missed her. That he couldn’t wait to see her. That he deleted his dating apps for her because he could see the relationship going somewhere.
That would be a breath of fresh air. That would be a dream.
But that’s not the way dating works. Nowadays, you have to lie. You have to ignore. You have to cancel. You have to pretend you care less.
For some reason, you’re condemned for being authentic and praised for being an asshole.
And she’s tired of that. She’s tired of timing her texts so she doesn’t send them too early or late. She’s tired of waiting for the right moment to admit that she’s falling hard. She’s tired of scheduling affection instead of letting it happen spontaneously.
She feels like the only one left that values authenticity over artificiality. That believes her generation has it all wrong.
Dating is meant to be fun, but how could she possibly enjoy herself when she’s pressured to say the right thing instead of the first thing that pops into her head? How is she supposed to find the one unique soul meant for her when everyone is pretending to be the same generic person?
She doesn’t understand. Doesn’t want to understand.
That’s okay, though. She’s not desperate. She’s not lonely. She doesn’t need a man to feel like she’s found meaning in life.
She can thrive on her own. So if she has to stay single until a guy comes along that feels the same way that she does — that doesn’t want to play games and will admit what he’s thinking as he’s thinking it — then she’s okay with that.
She has plenty of time to date.
For now, she’s happy on her own. Happier than she would be playing those senseless games.