1. How your hunger never seems all that pressing until you start doing your nails, and then all of a sudden, it’s like you haven’t eaten in 72 hours but you’re on your second coat and to try to open any food container is to risk ruining your masterpiece.
2. The skills involved with properly do a manicure at Sephora’s nail bar without incurring the wrath of the associates who know you’re really just there for the ‘try me’ shades and will not, in fact, be buying a $40 mascara today.
3. Choosing between two colors sometimes may not be that big of an issue as far as problems go, but God, does it get stressful when the manicurist is beckoning you to sit down and you have yet to choose between Essie and OPI.
4. Each individual polish brand is special and unique, but there will always be one that you love above all others. (Really, it’s okay that you have a favorite. We all do.)
5. Wanting to wear a summery color in wintertime will make you want to either go on vacation — yes, just so you can wear coral — or just consider this outright rebellion.
6. You may never admit to this, but you take your Pinterest #nailspiration board very. seriously.
7. Every time your nail salon posts something good on Instagram, you get kind of jealous you didn’t think of it first.
8. … You mean you’re not following your nail salon on Instagram?
9. Few things are more “D’oh!” inducing than walking out of the salon with a fresh polish, only to see the PERFECT color chilling quietly in the corner of the polish wall.
10. The agony of going to sleep thinking you’ve air-dried your handiwork, only to wake up with sheet smudges all over your once flawless paint job.
11. I mean, yeah, nail art can sometimes seem a little much and you’ll wax nostalgic for days when everyone just chose a solid, classic color…
12. But then you stumble across a nail art blog that just looks like somebody went and had a Picasso party all over their nails and you just. I mean. You want that.
13. Your personal pain scale tends to work on a level of 1 to accidentally ripping an acrylic off your middle finger.
14. Everyone always has their own patented way to remove glitter polish. Everyone will always say that their way of removing glitter polish is the best. Everyone will continue to use glitter polish, no matter how frustrating it is to remove. No one will ever learn.
15. Hush, babies, nobody ever talk about the E! Golden Globe Mani-Cam ever again. Sssh, it will all be well and forgotten one day.
16. But Snapchat was totally made for the moments when you do something new with your nails and have to show your friends like, right now right now.
17. That wonderful, redeeming moment when you Instagram the perfect shot of your new manicure (while you may or may not be clutching a coffee cup), and the photo gets more likes than any other photo. When one person on our Instagram feed has a good manicure, we all celebrate a good manicure. #nailgame is real.
18. Sometimes when you find the perfect color, you just HAVE to buy three different bottles’ worth just in case you never see it again. It’s better to be on the safe side.
19. Every time you try to tackle a nail tutorial, you realize it involves a sponge and some cling wrap and a toothpick and suddenly you’re MacGyvering the hell out of a miniature canvas.
20. 85% of your text typos do not occur when you’re drunk: they occur when you’re doing your nails and are hesitant to use your touch screen. (And whoever invented the finger recognition button on the newest iPhone was probably somebody who knows their nail game.)
21. Every time you go to the drug store, you swear you’re only going to get band-aids, but black out and wake up $25 later with zero recollection as to what happened, four new bottles of polish, and no band-aids.
22. You have very serious feelings as to whether you endorse or do not endorse the accent nail.
23. You swear a “What Your Favorite Nail Polish Color Says About You” test would nail* you to a T.
*Okay, I’ll stop.
24. You keep a spare bottle of your polish du jour in your purse at all times in case your nails flake or chip while you’re out and about.
25. You have, therefore, done your nails in some pretty weird places.
26. Few things are ever better than just spending the night chilling with Netflix, a glass of wine (because that’s much easier to pick up than actual food) and a new bottle of polish.
27. The day you finally caved and got a gel polish was life changing. And then, three days later, when you realized that baby does not chip, the heavens opened and you realized this is going to be the start of a b-e-a-uuuutiful (albiet expensive) relationship.