According to the best-selling book The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts there are five different ways in which people like to give and receive affection towards their loved ones. Problems arise in relationships when we don’t realize that people have these different ways of giving love. One person may feel unloved if their partner doesn’t tell them explicitly about their feelings every day while another could never hear “I love you” but be totally blissful as long as they spend hours together watching Netflix every week. If you or your partner’s love language is receiving gifts, here are some things to keep in mind.
1. They would never dream of going on a work trip without picking you up some token. It can be a cheap little souvenir that doesn’t cost much, but you both know it means “I was thinking about you.”
2. They make a big deal out of special days like birthdays and Christmas. It might seem cheesey to you but spending weeks planning and picking out the perfect gift for you is how they revel in their love for you. They do their best to give you something that genuinely makes your life better, because they love you.
3. They keep things you give them, like, forever.
4. You’ve actually referred to them as a hoarder because they hate throwing away what you view as trivial gifts from years ago. But they can’t help but want to be surrounded by all the physical representations of your love.
5. You find that the gifts you give them that they treasure most, are small trinkets you bought to express appreciation — not the ones that cost the most.
6. In the same way, they love when they can tell you treasure something you’ve given them. It means they understand the thoughtfulness behind the gift.
7. They help you pick out gifts for your family and friends. What can be a boring task for you is an exciting opportunity for them to help you demonstrate love to the people that are important to you.
8. They wrap gifts. It’s a small thing, but they want your gift-opening experience to be an event, not something hasty or poorly planned. They’ll put thought into all aspects of a gift-giving event.
9. Likewise, they’ll want the gift exchange itself to be an event — no pulling out gifts at the last minute. They want to sink into the moment of both giving and receiving gifts.
10. You find gifts you’ve given them displayed in places they look at every day — their jewelry box or desk, inside the medicine cabinet. These memories make their everyday life better.
11. They love to surprise you. For them, the anticipation of getting a gift is as much fun as actually receiving one, so they’re intent on giving you this joy as well.