1. They communicate with precision.
They do not alter their opinions based on who they are around. They care more about what they want to say than how other people could receive it: when someone doesn’t speak clearly and concisely, they are muddying their message because they are afraid of how it will be perceived.
2. They date mindfully.
They do not get “swept away” or completely caught up in a relationship. They choose the kind of love that helps facilitate the lives they want to live – not hinder them.
3. They are careful of what they give their mental energy to.
They recognize that it is not time, nor attention that is most precious and limited – it is energy. Energy creates your life and it is through energy that you experience your life fully. They are mindful of every bit they give away to each thought, interaction and task during the day.
4. They inform ignorant people, rather than just lambast them.
They don’t judge other people for not knowing better if they don’t first try to (gently, kindly, open-mindedly) explain a different, perhaps more informed, perspective. Otherwise, they are being just as ignorant.
5. They fight clean.
They don’t name-call, or let an argument play out when the other person just wants to “win,” rather than arrive at a mutual understanding.
6. They make personal development a #1 priority.
They recognize that it’s not about asking what you want, but who you want to become. They recognize that their perception informs and creates their experience, so it will only be as good as they are.
7. They respect even the people who don’t respect them.
They treat everyone equally, and do not use someone’s attitude as an indicator of whether or not they should alter their behavior around them. After all: character is how you treat those who can do nothing for you.
8. They don’t expect to love work all of the time, nor do they try to force themselves to.
Whoever thought joy is the essence of success probably did not accomplish very much.
9. They let their actions speak for them.
Rather than demanding respected, they give people a reason to respect them. They realize that people ultimately judge you based on your actions, not on what you say of your actions.
10. They make sure they’re capable of being completely independent before they go after love.
By doing so, they ensure they’ll be able to remove themselves from circumstances that are unresolvable or unbearable. Therefore, they never experience “needing” someone to survive. Because this is the case, they are free to actually enjoy their time with them. They know that you cannot love someone you need.
11. They focus not on what could go wrong, but how they would respond if something did.
Rather than freak out that they could lose a job, they groom their résumé and keep a blazer in the closet and remain prepared to find another one. Rather than worry about a relationship dissolving, they maintain the confidence that they could find someone else to love, or be alone happily.
12. They adapt.
If they aren’t comfortable with money, they pick up a book on personal finance. If they aren’t happy in a relationship, they communicate why. If they don’t like where they live, they find a new home. They do not accept the circumstances of their lives blindly, they respond and change them.