1. Curiosity will invade every thought. You’ll constantly wonder why they did it, what you could’ve possibly done to make them consider cheating, if they still love you… It’ll consume you until it hurts more than you ever thought possible. The questions will never go away and their answers will never be good enough to justify any of it.
2. You’ll wonder if it was your fault, even if they didn’t blame you. You’ll think you didn’t love them enough or pay enough attention, but the truth is, there are no good reasons to justify cheating! It’s better to have your heart broken because of one’s honesty than to have your heart broken because of one’s lies.
3. You’ll never feel good enough. The feeling of being insufficient will follow you around every time you think of what happened and that’s bullshit. Love is about embracing one another and making each other feel wanted. You’ll feel like maybe you’re not good enough in bed or you’ll think maybe you were too clingy, but once again, IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!
4. Forgiveness isn’t easy. Losing someone’s trust can take as little as half a second, but gaining it back takes time. Forgiving is a lengthy process. No matter how bad you want the whole thing to be over and for everything to go back to normal, it won’t for a while. You’ll always find the thought, the memory, hidden in your mind in the most obvious place, waiting for the right time to remind you that your heart is broken and that your attempt at a smile doesn’t hide it well enough. It’s hard to forgive someone you gave everything to because you know they’ll treat it with recklessness. They’ve done it before.
5. Trying to end the bad thoughts will be hard as well as trying to forgive them, but it won’t be as hard as trying to forget the pain. That type of pain is like a tattoo, it’s permanent. After it heals and months pass, you’ll forget it’s there, but seeing it seeing it will remind you. It will fade, but with time… a lot of time. Even when it starts to hurt less, thinking of it will hurt just as much.