1. I forgot how dramatic they try to make the Chino scenes. Shaky camera. Gritty lighting.
2. Where is Chino?
3. Lmao, INSTANTLY everything looks different when we enter Newport. Like, the colors are suddenly vibrant? They fixed the white balance? We get it. Toto, I don’t think we’re in Chino anymore.
4. Sandy Cohen is goals. Always.
5. “Dude, I’m on your side,” Sandy says to troubled Ryan. Dude, same.
6. SANDY’S BROWS WERE SO AHEAD OF THE CURVE.
7. Ryan with. the. damn. chokers.
8. How am I supposed to believe Seth Cohen is a loser with no friends? He’s attractive and funny as hell. This doesn’t add up.
9. Luke is so insecure. Toxic masculinity SO fragile.
10. SO MANY CHOKERS.
11. Is a Deb Ball a real thing? Because it seems rooted in patriarchal views. Introducing your daughter to the world – i.e. future prospects aka husbands??? HARD PASS.
12. I forgot how much this show made me love indie music.
13. I would, uh, die for Seth Cohen.
14. Whenever Summer ignores or dismisses Seth, my heart shrivels up a little. HE NAMED HIS BOAT AFTER YOU.
15. YOU DON’T DESERVE HIM, SUMMER!
16. Seriously, I would die for Seth Cohen.
17. Are we all ignoring the fact that Caleb’s 24-year-old girlfriend, Gabrielle, made out with Ryan, AN UNDERAGE HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT?!
18. Is it just me or is The Ryan Atwood look the exact same as The Angel look (from Buffy The Vampire Slayer and, later, Angel)? Quiet, brooding boys. Strong foreheads. A tendency to look up with a downturned head. I’m here for it.
19. Lol, Rachel is Mona from Friends. Mona sucked. So does Rachel. Go home Rachel/Mona.
20. I can’t even be mad at Julie. She’s the original Joanne The Scammer. Get yourself some Caleb money, girl. Started at the trailer park, now you’re here. HONEY, YOU WORK THOSE MEDIOCRE RICH MEN.
21. Hey Seth, I also celebrate Chrismukkah.
22. Okay so I know that Summer is the dream girl, but don’t Anna and Seth make more sense compatibility wise?
23. Hailey’s so hot.
24. Seth and Summer having sex for the first time is so realistic.
25. WOW, SERIOUSLY FUCK OLIVER!!!!
26. Also, really Marissa? You couldn’t trust your reliable af boyfriend when he told you had a bad feeling? Instead, you went to bat for the rando you met a few weeks ago in therapy? K.
27. JULIE IS HAVING SEX WITH THE BOY WHO TOOK HER DAUGHTER’S VIRGINITY. THIS IS BANANAS!!!!
28. Honestly, how do you come back from that? Oh hey, Mom, heard you fucked my ex-boyfriend. Wanna get brunch?
29. I felt zero emotion when Anna left. Literally did not care.
30. THE NANA IS WHO I ASPIRE TO BE ONE DAY.
31. Luke drunk listening to “Night Moves” by Bob Segar is peak summertime me.
32. LAS VEGAS SUCKS.
33. I’m still mad at Seth for abandoning everyone just because Ryan was trying to do the right thing by going back to Chino which IS IN THE SAME STATE AND NOT EVEN VERY FAR??? You selfish, Seth.