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I don’t want to be burned anymore. I don’t want to keep hurting. I don’t want to keep allowing myself stand to the side while everyone else takes center stage. I keep getting shot at. I keep getting punched. Yet still I smile. Still I say please and thank you. Still, I give.

I might hyperventilate beforehand, I might cry myself to sleep the night before, but that doesn’t matter. All that matters is that there are going to be days when I have the energy to push myself to do something terrifying. There are going to be days when I silence my anxiety for long enough to really live.

  Being someone who I shouldn’t be is wrong and honestly it took me a lot of time to realize it. Shame on me. I wanted to be noticed, I don’t know why.

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