August 10, 2016

I’m Not Ready, But I Could Be Ready For You

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 Emily & Steve Photography
Emily & Steve Photography

I promised I’d take a break from the madness of it all, from the destructive heart-breaks, from the unanswered questions, from the ignored texts, from the awkward silences, from the awkward run ins, from ‘the talk’ and from all the games disguised as love.

But here you are, making it look so easy, making it feel right and making it effortless.

Here you are, waking me up with good morning texts and asking about my day because you care and because it matters to you — because I matter to you.

Here you are, proving me wrong every time I tell you that you will eventually run away.

Here you are – wanting to stay.

Staying with me when I’m down, even if all you have to offer is a shoulder to cry on.

Staying with me when I’m lost, even if all you can do is hold my hand as I find my way.

Staying with me when I’m in pain, even if all you can do is wait by my side till it goes away.

Here you are, looking at me the way I always wanted to be looked at.

Here you are, giving me a reason to believe in myself again, to believe in life again and believe in love again.

Here you are, teaching me how to love again.

Here you are, loving me even when I’m being unlovable.

Because we both know that I’m ready but I’m scared.

We both know that I’m ready but I don’t want to be heartbroken again.

We both know that I’m ready but I’m saying I’m not in case you were not.

We both know that I’m ready but I’m protecting my heart from falling for another person who is going to shatter it.

But you make me want to be ready for you and even if I wasn’t ready, you’re the only reason I needed to be.

Because here you are, standing right in front of me, looking like everything I’ve dreamed of — looking like everything I’ve asked for.

And I’m done making excuses and I’m done telling lies. My heart is open and ready to be all yours.  TC mark

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