August 11, 2015

15 Men React To The Idea Of Taking Their Wife’s Last Name After Marriage

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What is the issue?

1. “I run the house—handle the cleaning, make the money, plan the vacations, arrange most meals, etc. My wife is a chill ass woman, so a lot of that is just informed by our different personality types. But since I’m the one doing all the work, I think I’ve earned the right to have her take my name.” — Oscar, 31

2. “I’m totally open to it. As long as my DNA is in my child’s blood, I don’t care what our last name is. I suggested to my girlfriend that we should hyphenate our names when we’re married, but she doesn’t want that!”— Stephen, 22

3. “If hoards of men started taking their wives’ surnames, it would be an unfortunate and perhaps irreversible step towards a matriarchal goddess culture, which blows for guys because those cultures used to routinely kill male infants and treat males like slaves. In a world where there are already very few incentives for men to get legally shackled, this is one slippery slope I wouldn’t want to slide down.” — Ricky, 27

4. “I’ll tell you this: I’d take my wife’s name in an instant, but only if it meant avoiding that male birth control stuff that plugs up your sperm tubes. That whole process sounds really unpleasant, not to mention untested on a 10-year time horizon.” — Titas, 23

5. “There’s something so emasculating about the notion of a man washing away his name altogether. The thought makes me uncomfortable, and kind of angry.”— Edgar, 25

6. “I would never do it. I’m not someone who pushes boundaries. I don’t like to call attention to myself, and taking my wife’s name would make me feel like I was on display—like I was trying to make some kind of statement, and that’s not me. For the same reason, I would never combine names, or hyphenate. It’s archaic, I know, but if my fiancée and I weren’t planning on keeping our own separate names, I would only agree to the woman-changes-her-name thing.” — Luke, 26

7. “My advice? Don’t get married on Opposite Day. Duh.” — Sawyer, 28

8. “No way. Rationale? It’s half a biological impulse, and half a contextual thing. Biologically, the word ‘domain’ keeps popping into my head. That sounds misogynistic, I know. But at my core, when all is said and done, I believe that the family is my domain. For instance, in any hypothetical state of emergency, I’m going be the one to sacrifice my life to save my wife and children. I should be the one whose name lives on.” — Raul, 29

9. “I guess if it was her number one sticking point, I’d be down. But I do quite like my last name. You can be president with a name like mine.” — William, 24

10. “My sense is that on a genetic level women want to marry up and part of marrying up is that they’re buying into a certain kind of—for lack of a better word—dynasty and that means taking a man’s name. For a man to change his name to her name would be to reverse a longstanding sociological phenomenon and I just don’t think a lot of women let alone men actually want that.” — Kyle, 27

11. “For me personally, it would never happen. I’m somewhat traditional in this regard and as the only male child in my family, I think it’s my duty to keep my family name and to pass it along to my children. That said, I would fully support any of my guy friends who wanted to take their wife’s last name. Why not? Seems silly that only men should have that honor.” — Alexandre, 36

12. “Listen, I’m a feminist. But we have to draw the line somewhere. Equal rights shouldn’t come at the cost of upending all established conventions. Why get married at all if you don’t want to embrace the related traditions?” — Elijah, 27

13. “I can’t even dignify this question with an answer. Whatever.” — Sebastian, 26

14. “I have some friends out west who’ve done the combo last name thing for the baby, and that seems fair. Starting a new lineage is kind of cool. But taking her name? That’s not fair. That’s just lame. No thanks.” — Ethan, 30

15. “My wife’s maiden name is really common, and my last name is very unique. So she was as eager to take my surname as I was to keep it. I guess I’m lucky things worked out the way they did, because this is a heavy question I’d rather not deal with.”— Mitchell, 31 TC mark

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