As an actively dating millennial, I have to say that I’ve been a victim of some of these intolerable acts. Some women brush it off as lack of maturity, but I can’t seem to bring myself to think that way. There’s no reason for men to act like this and there’s no reason women should accept it. Dating is hard these days and if you like someone, you may feel compelled to accept certain attitudes. The truth is if someone really likes you back, they will be willing to treat you how you want and should be treated and will have no problem with you saying no to any of these things.
1. Unsolicited D*ck Pics
If you didn’t ask for them and they’re being sent to you, that’s unacceptable. You have the right to not just ask someone, but demand that they refrain from sending you pictures that you did not ask for. Sexting is popular and people do it all the time, but if you do not feel comfortable engaging in this type of exchange, let it be known.
2. Being Called bitch, hoe, slut, easy, prude, needy, stupid, etc.
Sometimes words like these can be used as friendly banter and depending on the word and the way it’s said, it may even sound cute. If name-calling makes you feel bad about yourself, no matter how much you like the guy, tell him to stop. Words are powerful and no one who claims to like you will ever want to make you feel bad using words.
3. Physical abuse
None of it is ok. No hitting, kicking, grabbing, punching, pinching, biting, etc. People like to play rough sometimes and that’s ok, but only if YOU ARE ok with it. Safe words should always be used and never should they be ignored.
4. Verbal Abuse
If he insults the way you look, your religion, your job, or anything that makes you you, be bold and express your feelings. Again, words are powerful and more so if they’re coming from someone you like. After hanging out with a guy, you should never feel bad about yourself because of something he said about you.
If a guy says he can’t be with you because you have stretch marks, because your butt is too small, because you’re not curvy enough or your teeth aren’t straight, but wants to sleep with you anyway, he’s using you. If he’s shallow, but still willing to do the deed, do yourself a favor and peace out . You’re not a piece of meat to satiate his hunger for sex. You are a work of art that he should be proud to show off.
6. Unwanted Touching
Kisses, hugs, caresses, etc. If you didn’t want to or it made you uncomfortable, you don’t have to tolerate it.
7. Technological Stalking
If he’s constantly hitting you up and you’re not into him, kindly tell him to stop. If he won’t desist, block him. If he messages you asking who they guy in your new IG post is politely, but firmly, inform him that it’s none of his business. Getting text after text or FB message after FB message is harassment. You can answer if you want to and if you don’t want to you don’t have to.