One, it’s likely that they are in their late 20s/early 30s and still paying upwards of 50k a year for the privilege of providing indentured servant labor for a private university.
They are more intimidating than any grunting muscle bro, and I am filled with a terrified respect when I cross their path on my way to sweat it out on the elliptical in my promotional t-shirt.
“I bought these thinking “Oh, how cuuuute” but then never wear them.”
Eating clean (or vegan, or paleo, or gluten-free, or raw) doesn’t make you better than anyone else. We all have to find our way to feed ourselves well, and our food choices should not be a status symbol.
You see that money has nothing to do with generosity.
You have had at least one tragic first date with a guy who either worked “in journalism” or “On The Hill,” and spent the entire dinner telling you about how great it was and humblebragging about the important people he has met.
Sometimes when you’re at a party, you make an excuse to leave early and go home. You just can’t fake it, you’d rather be at home with Netflix and chicken nuggets than at some lame party, drinking just to have fun.
“Also, question: Are we too old to be pregaming, because those drinks are 12 dollars each and momma has bills to pay.”
Sometimes, living on the coasts (and in big cities) can be tough. It’s fast-paced, competitive, and disconnected.
I would get notifications for them, but the tag would generally always be removed by the time I got to it. The first time I actually caught one, it felt like someone had punched me in the gut.