9 Vanilla Things People Do In Bed That They Think Are Totally Racy


1. Experimental Bondage

If I have one more basic bitch drunkenly confess to me that she totally let her boyfriend tie her up – even though she knows that it’s sooo bad – my eyes are going to roll out the back of my head. If you have never busted out handcuffs and basic ropes and ties, I’m honestly not even entirely convinced that you’ve had sex. This is PG-rated stuff by now. It doesn’t make you into a porn star.

2. Power Play

So sometimes you play the dominatrix and sometimes you take the commands. You’ve mastered the downward glance and the “Yes Sir/Ma’am.” You know how to dole out degrading instructions and the give someone permission to cum. This may still feel totally taboo, but we’re all participating in some form. Show me a person who doesn’t like a little bit of power play in the bedroom and I’ll show you a filthy, filthy liar.

3. Sexting

So your significant other went away on business and you sent them some scantily-clad photos to tide them over. Or maybe you even pulled your top down for a guy you met on tindr in response to his tantalizing dick pic. Does this make you a little risqué? Sure. But does it make you out of the ordinary? Nope. Sexting is the new texting and we’re pretty much all snapping away these days.

4. Dominant Daddy/Little Girl Relationships

I’m not sure when exactly we all decided that calling our boyfriends “Daddy” was a sexy thing to do but alas we did and the DD/LG relationship was born. He spanks you when you’ve been bad, you self-identify as his ‘little slut.’ We get it. It gives you juicy new things to think about, like whether or not you’re a bad feminist and what you’re going to refer to your actual father as now.

5. Experimenting With Toys

There’s a drawer, shoebox or compartment in all of our bedrooms that we wouldn’t want our parents to open. So you bust yours out around your significant other and experiment with vibrators and butt plugs. Kudos on having the imagination to spice up your relationship, but sex toys make up a sustainable market for a reason – because everyone is constantly buying them.

6. Watching Porn Together

It’s cheesy, it’s scripted and the acting is just plain atrocious but that doesn’t stop any of us from watching it. If there’s anything better than a quiet night in with a high quality porno and your favorite box of toys, it’s a night with your partner who is willing to experiment with the real-life version of whatever you’re seeing on screen. The days of getting brownie points for being down to watch porn with your SO are over, though. Everyone with wifi and a sex drive has dabbled in the depths of dirty films.

7. Experimenting With The Same Sex

This doesn’t always reach the bedroom – sometimes it’s an innocent makeout at the bar, meant to attract the attention of nearby college bros. Either way, the fact that boys can kiss boys and girls can kiss girls isn’t a new revelation to anyone. They’re either going to assume you simply like that gender sexually, or they’re going to assume that you’ve had too much to drink. It’s no longer an astonishing taboo.

8. Doing Anal

The last time I played “Never Have I Ever” (I know, I know), there was one person in a group of fourteen men and women who had yet to try anal. One.

9. Partaking In Ass Play (As A Male)

PSA: Guys like fingers in their assess. And yet every single guy believes this to be a shameful secret, exclusive to him and him alone. Sorry, gentlemen. It feels good and we know it. No one’s shocked that the gentle finger insertion alongside a blowjob makes you come in seconds flat. Its cool. Everyone’s doing it.

In fact, by now it’s borderline vanilla.Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Just another twenty-something figuring it out as I go.

More From Thought Catalog