Are We Still Connected To The People We Lose?

It’s probably happened to you before. You ran into your ex partner at a shopping center, one that is closest to you but furthest from their house. Or you’ve had a look at their new partner who strikes a similar resemblance to… you? Most people may bring these small occurrences down to coincidence. But I am here to tell you something that you may or may not like hearing: they are not.

These “insignificant” actions are small things we are aware of, but we do not know if one night they decided to have pizza delivered to their door only an hour before you chose to do the same thing. Or if they shared a post that came across your feed that you also couldn’t resist doing.

We are always connected to those people in our lives that are no longer in them, whether it be an old boyfriend or girlfriend or a best friend that we no longer speak to. I don’t mean to say those old feelings are there, because people are capable of moving on and they should never feel tied down to the past. But this is a case of a phenomena we cannot control and something people should learn to appreciate and understand.

The truth is, those old lovers or friends crossed our path for a reason, and understanding why they did is important.

You see, we usually bond with those who think like us. We make friends based on differences sometimes, sure, but we bond when we have things in common—a love for a certain activity, a similar fashion style or music taste, and even a combined hate for something.

Is it so bizarre to think that person you once dated crossed your path because they, too, thought like you?

Deep down, they wanted to see that movie at the theater on the same day you decided to or they sat at the bar at the same time you did because they wanted to get drunk too. And that is the very reason why you two not only met but decided to create some amazing memories together.

So why is it when these relationships end, many people sigh in disgust when seeing these people again? Or feel tones of fear or dread?

If you have ever lost somebody, whether on good terms or not, you will probably run into these people again in your lifetime, and if you do, learn to appreciate that these people, in a sense, think like you.

And isn’t it cool to know that although things may have ended and you hold no sense of regret, this person allowed you to feel less alone for that small moment in time you were together?

I think acknowledging that is pretty special.

Author and poet writing about the dark and the light.

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