(March 21 – April 19)
You Snapchat screenshots of your dirtiest Tinder conversations. Then you feel anxious about them going viral.
(April 20 – May 20)
You fall asleep while having sex. You snore so loud the neighbours complain.
(May 21 – June 20)
You look for a presumably safe, secret spot to throw up. If you can’t find one, you just do it out the window, on your downstairs neighbour’s Air Conditioner. When you realize what you did, you panic and start throwing water on it to wash it clean.
(June 21 – July 22)
You start bitching around about your best friend, your exes, or anybody in the room. You spare no one.
(July 23 – August 22)
You make prank calls just like you did as a child. Only now you do it in at least 3 foreign (and one invented) languages.
(August 23 – September 22)
You call your parents and confess your weed addiction to them.
(September 23 – October 22)
You suddenly think it’s a good idea to insult your dreaded boss on social media. With tags for likes.
(October 23 – November 21)
You leak graphic snapshots of you/your significant other online. You send away a lot of dick pics/nude selfies.
(November 22 – December 21)
You hook-up with your co-worker(s) on a team building in public. The more the merrier.
(December 22 – January 19)
You cry hard. You kiss strangers. You blame it on your ex.
(January 20 – February 18)
You insist to have one more Tequila shot with literally everyone at the bar. Then you post selfies from the ER and caption them YOLO.
(February 19 – March 20)
You go on a texting-each-one-of-your-previous partners spree. You become highly creative with insults.