Rylie Borden

Even on the days when I don’t want to love you, I do. Even when I’m screaming at the stars, telling whoever is up there to take away this feeling, it never goes away.

It’s never easy, but if you’ve already left your abuser, you’ve done the hardest part. But now that you’re dealing with the aftermath, how do you heal?

It’s still heartbreaking to me, how much love we let go to waste.

I’m weeding out every last bit of you. My garden will no longer be contaminated by your abuse, your lies, your harsh words.

Flowers don’t just start out in full bloom; they take the rain and the sun and turn them into something beautiful.

I never thought I’d thank you for breaking my heart, for destroying my soul.

I was naïve to fall in love with you so quickly, so unconditionally.

It makes me wonder, reliving those moments, did you ever mean any of it?

Please don’t text me. Because if you do I’ll text you back. If you do, I’ll come over, with no hesitation.

You lost the best thing you could’ve gotten in this life, and you have no one to blame but yourself.

Anything you made a slight comment about, I fixed, desperate to hold on to you. Yet when I was crying, begging you to love me properly, nothing changed. 

Losing you freed me, gave me my self worth back. 

What happened was wrong. But I can’t blame you for that. You didn’t have a commitment to me, he did.

Stop waiting for him to show up with flowers and say he’s sorry. He’s not sorry, he’s not coming, he does not have the capacity to love like you.

I’m sorry I let him ruin me, I’m sorry I’ve become someone I never wanted to be.

Maybe it was me.