Let’s be honest and admit that clowns are terrifying. All of them. I’m sorry if your aunt plays a wacky clown on the weekends and visits children hospitals, but if I see her walking towards me, I’m getting in my car and probably calling the police. It’s just a perfect storm of creepy. To help us all increase our therapy bills, here are the ten creepiest clowns of all time. Enjoy!
American Horror Story just launched its new season, but it’s already given us one of the most terrifying characters in recent memory. We’ll see how the rest of the season plays out, because Twisty could be making his way up the list quite rapidly if things keep going like they did in the premiere episode.
9. Crazy Joe Davola
You probably weren’t expecting a Seinfeld character to make the list, but when he went from plain old Crazy Joe Davola, to Crazy Joe Davola the Clown, we all became a little more suspicious of those creepy circus performers.
Dead Rising has created so many memorable and terrifying characters, but none of them stand out as much as Adam, a deranged, chainsaw wielding clown that finds a way to be the creepiest guy in a room that’s full of zombies.
7. Captain Spaulding
Sid Haig is such a giant, intimidating man to start with, so when you add in a character that seems completely unstable and slap some clown make-up on him, it’s no wonder he transformed into the star of nightmares. Thanks a lot, Rob Zombie.
6. Ronald McDonald
I’m sorry, but this guy is beyond creepy. His makeup is terrifying and he’s a clown that’s only goal in life is to sell hamburgers to children. As a society, how are we cool with this?
5. The Poltergeist Clown
Seriously, what sort of parent would buy that for their children and then be the least bit surprised that demons are trying to murder them? You’re just asking for it. Just get them a gift certificate next time.
4. The Bicycle Clowns
Between Large Marge and those horrible clowns, Pee Wee’s Big Adventure ended up causing me more sleepless nights than Jason, Freddie, and Michael Myers combined. Are we sure this was a movie for kids and not just kids you wanted to psychologically torment?
The title for the show could’ve easily been Are You Afraid Of The Dark? No? How About Now After We’ve Shown You One Of The Most Evil And Demented Clowns You’ve Ever Seen In Your Life? It’s a little wordy, but it definitely gets the point across.
I’m fairly certain It is the reason most people now have a phobia of clowns. Tim Curry was masterful as the sewer-dwelling clown, even if he did eventually turn into a goofy looking giant spider.
1. John Gacy
Of course one of the most notoriously evil serial killers in history was formerly a clown. Why should that come as any surprise. He went by the name Pogo the Clown, which sounds just as terrifying as any other clown name you’ll hear.