This Is Me Carrying On Without You

This Is Me Carrying On Without You

This is me carrying on without you. This is me finally accepting that you and I are not right for each other. That I don’t march to the beat of your drum and you will never understand the lyrics to my song. This is me realizing that at one point this was all we ever wanted and it made perfect sense but somewhere along the line it all got lost in translation. It all just faded. It was suddenly meaningless.

This is me learning that we both speak very different love languages and we never understood each other. This is me realizing that what hurts me is what heals you and I admit that I ran out of energy to make things work. This is me recognizing that we both had our share of heartbreaks and we were just depleted, still a little broken. Still a little dark. This is me admitting that I couldn’t trust you with my heart when your hands were always shivering and your presence was always cold. I couldn’t find my safety with you. I couldn’t find what I was looking for.

This is me releasing you because the connection that used to feel effortless now feels like a burden and I no longer feel the need to express myself. I no longer feel understood. I no longer want to tell you how I feel. This is me accepting that all the promises that we promised each other when things were fresh and we were blinded by the flames of lust are all just a bunch of empty words now. This is me realizing that all the secrets we shared will go to waste and we will become strangers again.

This is me making peace with the fact that you and I are done. That we don’t belong together and this was not written in the stars. That everything that perfectly aligned in the beginning totally fell apart in the end. This is me relearning the toughest lesson of all, that losing people you once loved will always be part of your evolution and your journey. That to protect your heart, you sometimes must walk away.

This is me detaching from everything that used to remind me of you because now you’re just a memory. Now you’re just another name on the list of those who failed to make the cut. This is me carrying on without you because you slowed me down and I couldn’t wait for you to catch up. This is me carrying on without you because I walk better alone. I find my peace within myself without a single trace of you.

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Writing makes me feel alive. Words heal me. Follow Rania on Instagram or read more articles from Rania on Thought Catalog.

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