1. It took you so long to ‘figure it out.’ You didn’t feel that it was right in the depths of your heart, your mind didn’t connect the dots that leads you back to my heart and you were indifferent. You can’t be indifferent in love.
2. I was always trying too hard. So you can see me, so you can love me, so you can appreciate me. I realize now that these are things you should’ve just seen naturally. I understand now that you can’t make someone see your worth if they choose to keep looking the other way.
3. I was holding onto ‘someday.’ A magical day when you finally realize how amazing this could be and how we really belong together. A day that kept me going when I had nothing else to believe in – a day I am now glad never happened.
4. You didn’t really know who I was. You didn’t know my downfalls, you didn’t know what makes me smile, you didn’t know why some things scare me, and you didn’t know what makes me feel safe.
5. We didn’t share the same views on ‘family’. We didn’t really have the same vision of what a home should feel like, we didn’t share the same warmth and we didn’t share the same vows.
6. Your friends saw more potential than you ever did. They were rooting for us, for our story to come to fruition, they were rooting for an epic love story of two broken people who found a way to fix each other. They didn’t realize that two broken people can sometimes shatter each other to pieces.
7. You introduced me to darkness. Your love was like a tunnel, the further I got into it, the darker it got. I thought this was how love looks like from the inside, but I knew that this was a lie I created so I could stay. I wanted to escape to a love that offers an entire galaxy of shining lights.
8. I didn’t listen. To my friends, to my family, to your warning signs – to you. It’s my fault for digging my own grave and expecting you to get me out of it. It’s my fault that I counted on you to pick me up when you were kicking me when I was down.
9. Our words got lost in translation. You never knew how to interpret my messages and I wasn’t able to decode your encryption. We were reading the same book in two different languages and we couldn’t find a translator for each other.
10. The distance kept growing. The miles got longer and the nights got colder, we slowly drove away in different directions; you back to the desert and me back to the land. Our maps were never aligned. I could feel the poison leaving my body on the way back and realized our paths were meant to cross for a reason – so we can find our happiness somewhere else….away from each other.