This Is How You Prefer To Show Affection, Based On Your ‘Love Language’

Expert Gary Chapman has pinpointed the five main ways we love, which impact how we behave and who we are overall.

Joel Sossa
Joel Sossa

1. Physical Touch

Being touchy-feely comes naturally to you. You rarely recoil from physical contact with anyone, especially your significant other. When you’re feeling particularly loving, you’re unafraid to show it by getting up close and personal. You don’t feel a hint of self consciousness popping your partner’s space bubble. You will sit as closely to them as possible on the couch, drape your legs across their lap, or literally sit on them if you feel like it. You’re also quick to offer shoulder and back rubs—anything to get the flesh-to-flesh satisfaction you covet. Depending on your partner’s mood at the time, your sudden clinginess will either seem adorable or annoying. Either way, they’ll just smile and shake their head knowingly as you smother them.

2. Quality Time

When you’re feeling especially tender, you’ll do everything in your power to be in your partner’s company. That means you’ll find a way to intertwine your schedules so you can be present for whatever they feel like doing that day. You’ll find a way to study or work from wherever they need to be, or you’ll shelve all the errands and other things you should be doing in your free time so you can tag along with them. It doesn’t matter if they want to surf all day and you’re not much of a beach person. You’ll say yes to the ocean or to whatever other activity they’re in the mood for, all in the name of being together. If they have plans with friends, you’ll probably pout and give them the sad eye until they cave and invite you to join.

3. Words of Affirmation

Since you truly understand the power of flattery, when you feel super romantical you tend to dole out lots of compliments. You literally shower your partner with positive, feel good vibes. But you don’t just rely on the typical when it comes to amorous affirmations. You will sit and think for hours, digging deep inside yourself for the most thoughtful, meaningful ways to demonstrate just how much you care about your significant other. Then you will go to great lengths to deliver your kind, caring remarks in creative ways. In addition to saying some nice things out loud, you might leave several little love notes for your partner to discover, send them an actual hand-written card by mail, or create your very own meme to text them midday.

4. Acts of Service

You absolutely love doing things for the people you love. So when you wake up feeling good about life, aching to remind your significant other just how much you love them, you will think of all the little ways you can improve their day by taking on unpleasant tasks they typically do themselves. You will offer to cook for them and insist on cleaning up afterwards too. Then you’ll run to the pharmacy  and execute any pending returns they’ve been meaning to get to for weeks on end. As you complete each dull, undesirable task on their behalf, you will bask in the awareness that you’re making your partner’s life a little bit better with every ounce of effort you exert. Go you!

5. Receiving Gifts

When it’s time to show your main squeeze some appreciation, you will think long and hard about how you can surprise them with a very special gift. You’ll have to brainstorm for a while because you’ll need to outdo whatever it is you did the last time around, and as the years go by, you’re a tougher and tougher act to beat on the gift giving front. For starters, you’ll run through the recent past, searching for clues from conversations you’ve had as a couple about what might please them. Then you’ll go further back, trying to pinpoint which things they meant to buy over the years but never got around to purchasing. You’ll consider all of their hobbies and interests and the ways in which you might spoil your partner because they deserve it. Alternatively, you’ll turn to your box of keepsakes and DIY an awesome, priceless ode to your relationship using all the little knickknacks you hold onto just for that purpose. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

I adore the following, in no particular order: knee-high tube socks, acrostic poetry, and my little brother. Click here to learn more!

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