When I was doing this man’s butt hole, he clenched up tightly in response to the pain. When he finally released his the muscles, little bits of poo sprayed everywhere. I was wearing gloves and an apron, but a few spurts definitely got in my hair.
— Phoebe, 28
I had a one-time client who looked like she was in her late 60s. She was super relaxed and said that she was a pro at handling pain, which made me feel better about putting hot wax on a fragile old lady. As I positioned her legs, I could tell she was still strong and flexible. When I saw her vagina, though, I had to do a double take. There were bruises everywhere. I looked up to meet her eyes, and she’d anticipated my concern. “Don’t worry, Sweetie,” she said, “I like it rough. My husband really pounded me last night.” I was stunned, but also kind of impressed.
— Carla, 35
Once, I waxed a lady who was making gasping noises even when I wasn’t ripping the wax strips off. I figured she was really sensitive to pain, so as I went in to do the labia, I gently warned her that things might get more uncomfortable. She winced and said, “It’s okay. The contractions are just getting to me.” The woman was actually in labor! She wanted to look her best down there for the doctor, I guess.
— Farah, 39
I had a client once who was so obese that I had to use one arm to hold up the woman’s fat rolls just to locate her vagina. There were a lot of dingle berries to look out for with that one.
— Carol, 35
One customer insisted on being accompanied by her boyfriend. I agreed, but I’ve never felt weirder during an appointment. After giving the lady a few minutes to change out of her clothes, I walk in to find her butt naked instead of wearing the paper gown I’d provided. Her partner was just staring at her. I can’t be sure since my backed was turned to him, but I think he was fondling himself as I went about my work.
— Lyla, 34
I was seeing someone new to Brazilian waxing who said she wanted her butt waxed too. But as soon as she spread her ass cheeks for me, she started cracking up. It only got worse as I started with the wax. She laughed harder and harder. I guess she was really ticklish in that area for whatever reason. You’d think the giggling would be a nice change from screams of pain, but it was so hard to stay professional and not to laugh at her laughing.
— Gillian, 32
One of my clients is required to get her entire body waxed before her period starts every month for religious reasons. Waxing hurts like hell, and I guess it hurts even more if you’re not really getting it done by your own choice. This woman screams hysterically throughout the process, which is always especially long for her because she gets the head-to-toe treatment. The last time she was in, the police actually turned up. Someone had called in to report a possible “torture chamber.”
— Theresa, 27
This woman came in and asked if I’d wax her even though she was on her period. I said of course since I wax women wearing tampons all the time. But when I came back into the room after giving the customer some time to change, what I saw looked like a murder scene. Her disposable cloth panties were drenched in blood, and there was blood all over the table. Standing there with her bloody hands, she says, “my flow’s pretty heavy.” Luckily we have the right to refuse services so I politely excused myself and notified my manager of the situation.
— Jules, 30
When my older brother brought his new girlfriend over for dinner, I realized immediately that she was a client. I didn’t say anything at the table, but I pulled my brother aside to tell him I’d seen the goods before he had! Awkward.
— Rachel, 36
At my very first job, I had a customer who handled the waxing pain really well but as soon as the aloe vera calming mixture touched her skin, she started screaming like crazy. Confused, I squirted a bit more onto her immediately. But then I noticed an odd smell. The cleaning staff had accidentally filled my unmarked spray bottle with industrial strength cleaning solution. I apologized profusely, but I never saw her again.
— Darlene, 27