Marisa Donnelly

I want to figure out who you are and what you love, and maybe, just maybe, see if you could ever love me.

Is it easy for you to simply say ‘she’s gone?’
Than to see how far
your legs will take you.
Are you afraid
of what this, what us
could be?
Because I am too.

That’s how fragile trust is. One minute you know a person, and the next minute they transform before your eyes, becoming someone foreign and strange and terrifying. Becoming someone you didn’t know they had the power to be. And there’s no going back.

Sometimes I wonder if it was easy, letting me go.

I will always be thankful for our slice of time on this earth, for the moments we held hands, for the way we laughed, for our lazy Saturday afternoons, for the way we kissed as if time was running out.

I’ll never stop believing that we will one day find our people, that we will be connected to others, that our lives will be blessed by the relationships we have, even if they don’t always go as planned.

Please, don’t let pain keep you from finding the love you deserve.

 It wasn’t until distance came between us that I realized how hard it is to miss something that was never yours to miss.

Life is too short to fall for people who don’t love you loudly, or for relationships that don’t set fire to your soul.

I’ve never been good at loving just a little. I’ve always been all in, or nothing. I’ve always given my full heart away.

Maybe I just want someone to call mine. Or maybe I’m just lying to myself, and what I’m really missing is you.

I know that you won’t forsake me, won’t leave me by myself, won’t abandon me. I know that you’ll lead me to the right person, or to the life I’m meant to live, even if that’s a life I didn’t imagine.

Caution: you may need some tissues.

Pretend she’s already out the door. Pretend she’s already moved on and happy with someone else. Pretend that getting her back is the most important thing in your life and fight for her like she’s already gone.

I know he’s made you smile, made you laugh, made your world feel so filled. And I know it seems empty without him. But you must let him go, sweet girl.

You’ll know I’ve fallen for you when I want to show you my secret places. When I want to share the most precious spaces of the earth with you. When I want to bring you into where I’ve called home, where I’ve felt safe.

Real, passionate love is going to be hard. And maybe by telling ourselves to leave, to move on, to let go, to search for another, we’re really just teaching ourselves that relationships and love are impermanent. Maybe all we’re really teaching ourselves is to give up

Maybe God didn’t want you to be my forever person. And I’ve accepted it now. I understand. Sometimes people are only mean to touch our lives for a period of time.