34 Guys On Things Women Do That They Will NEVER Understand

@saritawalsh / Twenty20.com
@saritawalsh / Twenty20.com
Found on AskReddit.

1. Taking WAY too long to get ready.

“My GF asks me if I’m ready to leave, so I put my shoes on, and start to leave. I get to the door, and she’s not even close to ready to leave. She still needs to put on socks, put on her shoes, get her wallet, her coat, grab her phone, etc.

Even if I give her a good five minutes after she asks if I’m ready to go, she still does this shit! It drives me insane.”

2. Expecting us to figure out what they’re mad about.

“Expect us to figure out what they’re mad about instead of just having a conversation with us to resolve the issue like a regular goddamn person.”

3. Telling us to do something, then getting pissed off when we do.

“The other day my wife told me I should go fishing. then she got pissed off when I went fishing. Why?”

4. Getting mad at us for things we ‘did’ in their dream.

“Why do women get mad at their SO for something they ‘did’ in a dream?”

5. Fishing for compliments on social media.

“When a girl’s social media consists of:

[Photo] Caption: ‘makeup looking awful today :3’

Replies: ‘You look gorgeous babe,’ ‘so pretty xx,’ ‘stunning :O’

It’s such a forced way of getting compliments, you know you don’t look awful in the photo, why else would you upload it??? Makes me cringe every time.”

6. Being sweet to each other in public, then trash-talking each other in private.

“The whole scenario where two girls act like they are best friends to each other’s face and then trash talk each other the moment that they separate. I feel like this isn’t nearly as common in guys, but I could be wrong.”

7. Being completely incapable of picking a place to eat.

“Me: ‘where do you want to eat’……… My GF: ‘I don’t care just pick a place’………….. Me: ‘Italian it is!’……………GF: ‘No’………. Me: ‘Sushi?’……..GF: ‘No’…… Me: ‘Mexican?’……GF: ‘No’ ……Me: ‘HOLY FUCKING SHIT IF YOU REALLY DON’T FUCKING CARE THEN STOP SHOOTING DOWN ALL MY FUCKING IDEAS AND JUST FUCKING PICK FOR YOURSELF!!!!’”

8. Criticizing us for being on reddit while they’re on pinterest.

“My girl criticizes me for wasting time on reddit while she’s on pinterest.”

9. Thinking guys will like you more if you try to make them jealous.

“Why do girls (some) think that making a guy jealous will make him like you more???”

10. Waiting to show interest until I start dating another woman.

“Why do women wait to show interest after I’ve started dating another woman? That’s some twisted fucking logic, “I kinda sorta like him, but he seems interested, so I better ignore him—wait he’s interested in someone else? No pay attention to me!”

Not saying all women do this, but I’ve had this exact thing happen 3 separate times.”

11. Keeping rocks in the shower.

“My wife has a rock in the shower. Apparently this is a thing women do. I don’t get it.”

12. Starting a conversation in the middle.

“Start a conversation in the middle of the conversation, without me being a part of or knowing the first half of it…then getting upset when I ask ‘What the fuck are you talking about!?’—Not an isolated incident, and confirmed this happens with other husbands and their wives…constantly, WHY!?”

13. Talking during TV shows, then telling us to be quiet during ads.

“Talk during TV shows, then tell me to be quiet during ads.

Wait for me to leave room and go upstairs, then try to start a conversation, getting angry she has to shout.

Ability to discuss every friends’ colleague, relative, acquaintance, etc. from a girly night out – then tell me each detail. (I don’t know these people)

Inability to understand how I didn’t ask how John’s father was during our lads’ night out.”

14. Shopping until they drop.

“Shopping as recreation. My wife will spend 2+ hours every time we go to the grocery store, it would maybe be 20 mins if I were alone. Not even going into all the other stores she goes into… ‘Shop til you drop’ is a thing, and I don’t understand why.”


15. Telling us to open up, then dumping us when we do.

“Every girl I’ve dated has told me to open up to them and be more of myself. After I did they dumped me because they didn’t like the real me. Why do you do this if you don’t mean it?”

16. Sleeping in the same bed with other girls.

“Girls sleep in the same beds as each other shortly after becoming friends. This level of comfort confuses me as a male.”

17. Criticizing a man for ‘acting like a woman.’

“Criticizing a man for ‘acting like a woman.’ Why use that phrase? It seems to imply that being a woman or acting like one is pathetic or weak or shameful. I can see some overly macho guys using that phrase, but it’s so weird to hear women say it. As a father of a little girl it breaks my heart to think that people, especially other women, would assume such negative qualities about her because of her gender.”

18. Looking for hidden meanings in what we say.

“Reading into the things we say and then getting mad at us for the (nonexistent) ‘hidden meaning.’ Testing us without telling us we are being tested, then getting mad because we failed the test. You’re just setting us up for failure and setting yourselves up for anger.”

19. Flirting while engaged or married.

“A girl at this place I used to work would always flirt with me. It escalated into smacking each other’s butts, talking about sex, getting drinks or lunch after work, that kind of thing. I asked her out on a legit date to get some fancy dinner and she’s like ‘no, I’m engaged.’ Similar things have happened to me 3 times with married/engaged women. I just don’t get it.”


20. Playing hard to get.

“This whole hard to get or trying to get me to chase you. I’m almost 30, I’m not interested at all and I will just stop talking to you.”

21. Trying on their own clothes in front of a mirror for no reason.

“Try on their own clothes repeatedly in front of a mirror for no reason, even if they aren’t going anywhere or doing anything that day. If someone gave me the choice of trying on all my pants and shirts repeatedly for an hour or stabbing myself in the leg with a fork, my only question would be ‘how hard?’”

22. Double standards about cheating.

“If my friend is cheating he’s scum, a bastard, doesn’t deserve her. If her is friend is cheating it’s because her other half is scum, a bastard, doesn’t deserve her.”

23. Taking forever to get out of the car.

“Why does it take them so goddamn long to get out of the car when we arrive at our destination?”

24. Whining about problems rather than trying to fix them.

“The whole support me, don’t try to fix the problem thing. I just don’t get it. If I have a problem and I tell you about it I want to hear solutions. When a woman has a problem and tells a man about it, she’s looking for support and understanding. It’s like your house is on fire, a man would get water on the fire and make a plan to begin rebuilding the house while he’s trying to put out the fire. A woman would want to cry with the owner and share stories of how great the house used to be, even while it’s still burning.”

25. Poaching our French fries.

“Men are protective of their food. You know this. So why are you always eating our fries? We asked you if you wanted any of your own, and you said no. But then you go and poach like a third of my order. If you want to share food, please confine it to desserts.”

26. Caring about trivial shit.

“They all seem to just…care so much about so much shit that shouldn’t matter to them at all. That might not be true in general but, from my experience, it seems like girls just do not have the ‘just don’t give a fuck’ gene that most guys have when it comes to other people’s relationships or other private matters.”

27. Going to the bathroom in roving packs.

“Going to the bathroom in roving packs.”

28. Being fake-nice to people they hate.

“See someone they hate. Act all happy when they see them. Then when they walk away they immediately start talking shit.”

29. Obsessing over who is fucking their ex.

“Why they care so much about who is fucking her ex. Is your ex, not your actual relationship, stop giving a shit about it…”

30. Doing the laundry half-assed.

“Half-assed doing the laundry. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t need anyone to do my laundry for me but it irks the daylights out of me when someone else does their laundry and leaves it in the washer or dryer for fucking days and I have found females to be a repeat offender of such a thing.”

31. Giving way too much backstory.

“How women give way to much backstories to a story. e.g.

Her: ‘So I was talking with Lisa this morning, you know Lisa the one who is married to the banker that bought that huge house last December. It is seriously the most beautiful house I’ve ever see, 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms and that outdoor kitchen is absolutely beautiful. I think if we got a house like that we’d really have to get the interior decorator that they got. His name was Tom and oh wow let me tell you about Tom. He has done 5 houses in the last month that got shown magazines, i’m telling you babe this guy is good, we are totally going to get him when we get a new house….’

Me: ‘So what did Lisa say to you….’?

Her: ‘Oh she told me to tell you hi’”

32. Trying to make their sneezes cute.

“Try to make their sneezes cute. You’re not fooling anyone…”

33. Passive-aggressiveness.

“Being so passive-aggressive.

Everything is layer upon layer of guesswork and subtlety and deception. Why can’t you just come out and say what you mean; lay it all out on the table?

And by contrast, when a guy tries to have the respect of being upfront about something, we often get attacked for being too direct or insensitive or whatever.

Do you want men to respect you and treat you as equals, or like delicate children. You can’t have it both ways.”

34. Mixed messages.

“Mixed messages. Could you just… not?

I have a hard enough time piecing together what people want from me when they’re straight-up about it, but when you’ll flip from ‘just friends’ to grinding on me from one day to the next? That really fucking does not help.

And no, it doesn’t make me want you more, it makes me want to wash my hands of the confusing mess you apparently want to turn our relationship into. I’ve got enough bullshit to deal with on a day to day basis without you adding to it.”
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Lorenzo Jensen III

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