1. I thought that babies came out of the anus.
“I thought that babies came out of the anus. The only thing I thought a vagina was for was to pee.”
2. I thought girls had their periods out of their tits.
“When I was in 4th grade I thought girls had their periods out of their tits. Don’t ask why.”
3. I thought women had huge cocks.
“When I was probably 11, I accidentally stumbled across a website with am album of women with huge erect penises (‘women’ is probably the wrong term, don’t kill me). And the website referred to them as ‘cocks.’ So, for a few years I thought men had penises, small ones like the one I had, and women had ‘cocks,’ huge monstrous penis-looking things.”
4. I thought women peed through their butts.
“I thought women peed through their butts.”
5. I thought that women had a third nipple where their vagina is.
“That women had a third nipple where their vagina is.”
6. I thought the hole was further up.
“How far back the hole was. I thought it was way further up. I was always confused why some people ‘went into the wrong hole.’ Now it makes sense.”
7. I thought that since they had lips, vaginas looked exactly like a mouth.
“I used to think the vagina looked exactly like a mouth. I had heard that there were lips down there, so naturally that’s what I pictured.”
8. I thought women pooped out of their penis.
“When I was younger I thought women had male genitals and the roles were reversed. So I thought women pooped out of their penis.”
9. I thought women peed from their vagina.
“I thought that they urinated from the vagina. It was actually an interesting tidbit when I found out that they don’t.”
10. I thought the vagina was a tiny hole, as if you punctured the skin with a screwdriver.
“When I was a kid, my mum told me the vagina is a hole in the crotch area. When I thought ‘hole,’ I thought it was literally just a tiny hole, as if you punctured the skin with a screwdriver.
Boy, was I wrong.”
11. I thought women had three identical butthole-esque holes.
“I thought they had three identical butthole-esque holes in their butt one for pooping, one for having babes, and one for peeing. I also thought dicks had pores from which sperm would come out of on the sides because the other hole is used for peeing.”
12. I thought women had five secret holes that they couldn’t show men.
“That women had secret holes they couldn’t show men. Like, 5 of them. Didn’t learn the truth until I was 11. Also thought they peed out their butts.
13. I thought that women could produce milk from their breasts all the time.
“I used to think that women could produce milk from their breasts all the time, not just during pregnancy. So I was always shocked and slightly baffled as to why I’d see women go to the shops to buy milk. I used to think: ‘Why don’t they just whip it out and squeeze some milk out onto their cereal?’ It was mainly an economic thing playing in my mind—why spend a pound or so on a pint of milk when you have a perfectly decent supply of your own which is available for free?”
14. I thought women peed from their butts.
“Women pee from their butts.”
15. I thought vaginas looked just like assholes.
“When I was a kid I thought vaginas looked just holes. Like assholes. Just…a hole. When I saw a vagina the first time I was a little grossed out. It looked like someone mutilated that hole.”
16. I thought women gave birth through their ass.
“That women give birth through their arse. I didn’t learn the facts till I was 13.”
17. I thought girls had a second set of nipples on their butts.
“Oh man, when I was younger I thought girls had a second set of nipples on their butts….shudders.”
18. I thought you peed in the girl to get her pregnant.
“I always thought you peed in the girl to get her pregnant. Like I legitimately thought that you’d slip that bad boy in, empty your bladder, and next thing you know, a baby is on the way.”
19. I thought girls peed out of their butts.
“When I was in preschool I thought girls peed out of their butts and that’s why they always say down when they went.”
20. I thought that vaginas got hard.
“I thought that vaginas got hard.”
21. I thought that vaginas were filled with gooey, caviar-like beads.
“I thought that vaginas were filled with gooey, caviar-like beads. I believe this misapprehension traces back to a 20/20 episode from my pre-adolescence which featured a story a doctor who would perform vaginal examinations without gloves. The mental process from that to ‘caviar jelly’-filled pussy is lost to the dustbin of history, but it stuck with me until the first time I saw pornography.”
22. I thought women had two or three vaginas.
“For a while I thought women had 2 or 3 vaginas. The reason why I thought this was because I saw porn at a very young age. There was a woman that was getting DP. I instantly thought that this woman had 2 vaginas. All of a sudden, a third guy shows up and also gets in on the action. Now that I know better, what I saw was 2 penises going into 1 vagina and 1 penis going into the anus.”
23. I thought pregnancy just miraculously happened.
“When I was a little kid, I thought pregnancy just…happened. Like, you get married, then if you are lucky and God deems you worthy, the woman magically gets pregnant. I assumed that’s why people called it a miracle and all that. And when a woman gets pregnant out of marriage it is God’s accident. I was kind of dumb as a kid.”
24. I thought the clitoris was inside the vagina.
“Definitely thought the clitoris was inside the vagina.”
25. I thought women pee from the same hole you stick your pee-pee in.
“That women pee from the same hole you stick your pee-pee in.”
26. I thought babies came out of a woman’s belly button.
“My mom told me that babies always come out of a woman’s belly button. I didn’t learn the truth until I was about 13.”
27. I thought the vagina was a hole in the front like a socket.
“I thought that since my cock when hard clearly needed to be inserted straight into a woman, meaning their vagina was a hole in the front, similar to their belly button, kinda like sticking a plug into a socket.”
28. I thought women’s nipples were like little erect dicks.
“Jokingly asked a girl in middle school what got hard when they were horny, then spent years imagining women’s nipples as little erect dicks.”
29. I thought girls didn’t have any genitals.
“Until I was about 6, I thought girls legit didn’t have any genitals and when they sat down to use the bathroom it was because one hole took care of all the business. All of it.
30. I thought women didn’t poo.
“I used to believe women didn’t poo until my first girlfriend took a dump on my chest.”
31. I thought girls’ poop only comes out during their periods.
“Around 7th grade I had a close girlfriend of mine go into full detail explaining that girls do not poop and that all of their waste comes out during their periods. Turns out they poop. I think.”
32. I thought women had one long continuous boob.
“That instead of two boobs, women had one long continuous boob.”
33. I thought girls had penises, too.
“Well, the first time I took a girl’s pants off I wondered why she didn’t have a boner, too. Then I realized that girls don’t have penises. I’d like to say that I knew that ahead of time, but clearly I did not.”