20 Stupid Things I Only Do While Drunk

drunk moments
Michael Discenza

1. Watch shitty Lifetime movies and become convinced that my next door neighbor is a serial killer.

2. Tell secrets I swore I would never tell.

3. Stalk my ex and like his Instagram picture and then slowly come to the realization that I just did that so I quickly unlike it and pray he doesn’t notice.

4. Facetime my best friend for a solid three hours and bitch about anyone and everyone.

5. Pluck my eyebrows. Why the fuck do I do that?

6. Sob about a boy who ghosted me who I talked to for like a day.

7. Buy new sheets on Amazon for no reason.

8. Stalk my ex friends and start to want to be friends with them again.

9. Write really bad poetry and convince myself I’m the next Rupi Kaur.

10. Message my friends at 2 am being like- PAY ATTENTION TO MEEE.

11. Listen to old Taylor Swift songs and cry about her not having curly hair anymore.

12. Eat way too many Babybel cheeses.

13. Message my first love (always a bad idea).

14. Think about moving to California like, tomorrow.

15. Rewatch Sex and the City and come to the conclusion that Carrie Bradshaw is a narcissistic bitch.

16. Snapchat the boy who ghosted me and still get surprised when I get no response.

17. Contemplate what my life will be like in ten years. Get scared I’ll die forever alone.

18. Look at pictures of when I was in love and try to pretend like I don’t miss it.

19. Start a Pinterest board on future tattoos and remember that I have no pain tolerance whatsoever.

20. Overshare. Always. TC mark

Lauren Jarvis-Gibson

For more poetry and writing follow me on Instagram!

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You look back and you just feel stupid.
You can’t forgive yourself for falling
or believing all the lies.
You reread every text.
You relive every memory.
And it all starts making sense —
he never wanted love.
He only wanted attention.
He only wanted validation.

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