14 Guys On The Brutally Honest Reason Why They Never Tried To Win Back Their Ex


1. “I was just so emotionally exhausted from the relationship and the constant fighting that I couldn’t even figure out if I missed her. The peacefulness felt so good that I just left it alone.”

–Darin, 25

2. “We have all the same friends and even though the breakup was ‘mutual’ it still felt like it was more so instigated on her part. My pride and self-esteem has taken a serious beating and I honestly don’t know if I could muster getting rejected by her a second time, especially when I already feel like half my friends can no longer look at me without pity on their faces.”

–Wes, 27

3. “She is not an emotionally sympathetic or supportive person, she made me miserable, and I didn’t realize it (even though my friends did) until I had had a month away from her. Not going back.”

–Marc, 24

4. “We both said we weren’t looking for anything serious, but eventually I was the one to really ‘fall’ first and then bare my feelings to him and then tell him I wanted to be with him. So even though he eventually said he wanted to be with me too, he was also the one to break things off a few weeks ago and I got tired of feeling like I was begging him to be with me.”

–Jared, 31

5. “I’m stubborn. And I haven’t figured out a way to fix myself yet.”

–Vinny, 29

6. “I did try. We were on-again-off-again God knows how many times, and every time, I was always the one to suck up my pride and tell her I wanted her back. But this final time was enough for me so I haven’t spoken to her for three months. I’m still feeling shitty and missing her a lot, but at least I have some of my self respect back.”

–Wade, 26

7. “She broke my heart and even if I wanted her back, I’m not sure I could think of her without feeling pain and a shit ton of anxiety.”

–Jon, 23

8. “To be frank, I had been looking for a way out of the relationship for a long time but was too scared to cut it off and be responsible for causing her pain. I should have just manned up, but she eventually broke it off with me and I think she expected me to chase after her, but I just let it be and never return her calls when she reached out again a few days later. It was a coward move but I’m so happy to not be with her anymore that I don’t care.”

–Daniel, 28

9. “I’m tired. I’m just really, really tired from it.”

–Jerome, 27

10. “Because I cheated on her and I feel like I don’t have a right to beg her to take me back, even if I wanted to. (I do want to.)”

–Evan, 25

11. “I’m having a lot more fun on my own again than I thought I would. Not just the stereotypical ‘going out with the bros’ thing. But I’m really enjoying having my weekends free, going on dates, having a whole bed to myself. She wasn’t even high-maintenance, she was chill. But I kind of got more dependent on her than I realized.”

–Nathan, 26

12. “I’m too angry and blindsided to try to win her back. One day I thought we were happy, I was getting ready to buy a ring, and she dumped me, over the phone, out of left field, and couldn’t give a reason other than that she was just not feeling the same anymore.”

–Arch, 30

13. “She told me not to. And the look in her eye told me she was 100% serious.”

–Jake, 22

14. “I didn’t think I’d make it through the breakup the first time around. If I tried to win her back and she turned me down, I don’t think I could deal with it all over again.”

–Mikey, 26 Thought Catalog Logo Mark

I’m a staff writer for Thought Catalog. I like comedy and improv. I live in Chicago. My Uber rating is just okay.

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