14 Proper Ways To Think About What Exactly A Big Penis Is

If there’s one thing I’ve learned from reading and writing for Thought Catalog it’s that people, seemingly all people, love reading about cocks but the size discussion is generally frowned upon and I think that’s because it’s not discussed properly. What I mean to say is that it’s discussed in the context of what women think about cock size rather than including what men think about it and I think how men think about it and perceive it matters a great deal. I’ll try to address that a bit here with discussions of the physical up front and the rest towards the end. Regardless, I consider the below to be objective truth. I’m straight so this will be like reading an article from a straight man because that’s what it is.

1. So, the answer is basically anything longer than 7 inches or 6 inches in girth.

Those are all big. The average length being anything between 5-6 (irrespective of race, don’t even try) anything above 6 is ‘above average’ and anything lower than 5 is ‘below average’.

Average girth is between 4 and 3/4 inches and 5 and 1/4 inches around. Same deal, anything above is above average and anything below is below average. Look up any study you want. They all fall on this range.

Dicks are measured on the top from the pubic bone for length and at their thickest point for girth although this really varies.

2. Statistically, there are no 12 inch dicks.

Hell, there aren’t even any 11 inch dicks. I’ve seen one, count it, one dick that was legitimately over 10 inches and he wasn’t born with it, he made it. Yes, made it. Nuff said on that here or this won’t get published.

So, any talk you hear about a cock that’s over 8-and-a-half inches long is most likely bullshit in every way. Porn lies, most porn dicks are under 8 inches.

Lexington Steele, the infamous pornstar is 9 and he’s among the top four or five in the industry. Danny Dong is even longer, who cares? Porn hates you and it wants you to be insecure because it knows you compare both literal and figurative cock size, in your head at least. It wants you to be bad in bed. It wants you to stay with it and it alone and spend money, get clicks, etc. It is not a viable alternative to loneliness.

3. There’s a myth out there (no idea where it came from) that says that women cannot accommodate a penis larger than X inches.

Well, there’s a limit, yes, but when aroused a woman’s cervix lifts higher into her body. Many women can accommodate 8+ inches. That’s the way it is. If you’re not of that length then don’t sweat that you’re not “filling her up” or whatever. You’ve got what you’ve got. It’s part of you. Love yourself. Unless she’s obsessed with a certain physical feeling or mental state then it won’t matter.

4. There’s growers and showers (that’s show-ers).

A lot of cocks simply sit up and if they’re big when soft they seem like they’re going to be monstrous. A lot of cocks are small when flaccid as in very small and can grow up to three times their length when hard. Ask me how I know. Don’t sweat it in the showers (that’s showers) if you feel insecure because of that 50-year-old business man that looks like he’s got a fire hose hanging from his pelvis. I could be wrong but more often than not he’s showing all he’s got already. Besides, your flaccid gets longer as you age because gravity.

5. ‘Big dick’ in the business world has an incredible number of meanings.

I’ve heard things about cocky bosses such as “the guy thinks he’s got the biggest dick in this place” and etc. Almost all men, at some point, equate a big dick with power. That gets reinforced by Hollywood impromptus, by ex-girlfriends who might talk about a big dick with a certain amount of awe. *Shrug* it happens.

I believe that there’s such a thing as a big dick mentality or, at least, what people often associate with a big dick. That thing is confidence. None of us are confident all the time but if you’re putting mental weight on the size of your junk and it’s not huge then that’s a losing game because there it is, unchanging. So, focus on things that you can control. Confidence is about being good at things, about being well informed, about being kind and have personal boundaries for yourself. Mostly though, it’s about knowing what you want. If you don’t know what you want then you may feel, figuratively, limp. Right? The metaphor works because we all know it. It’s basic deep brain stuff.

6. Don’t ever stay with someone who makes you feel badly or critical about aspects of your body that you can’t change.

I’ve had female friends who talked disparagingly to me about their mate’s smaller than average genitals. People do this, they say shitty things. He couldn’t help what he had but he was desperately in love with her and she used that against him. She’s not a bad person, basically, she just thought and said bad things to him. It wasn’t his fault but he should have quit her as soon as she started with the whole size discussion.

There are things I would never say to my girlfriend even if I felt them. Some people just aren’t a match and this is okay. You not being her match or vice versa is meaningless. It’s just how life is.

Not everyone’s a good pairing. There should be no morality attached to this. Live and let live. Regardless, don’t tolerate cock shaming, ever.

7. As far as archetypes go, big dicks have pretty much been associated with the gambit.

Orion has a big one (that’s not his sword) but they were seen as barbaric by the Greeks as well and a small one was seen as more in line with the ideal form since the mind was the most important thing about a man.

There’s always a battle between body and mind in every man I’ve ever known, myself included. Between the “ravisher” and the classical “lover.” Cultivate the lover and a more appealing ravisher will appear. Let your virility fuel your mind.

8. Women are notoriously bad at judging specific size and besides, men are the only ones that are basically engineering professionals about their dicks.

If you know you don’t have a big one then don’t ask if she thinks you do. This puts her in a terrible situation if she likes you and an annoying situation if she’s just ho-hum.

You know what you’ve got. Don’t go chasing down rabbit holes trying to find out who she’s been with that was bigger than you.

The answer, if she can even provide one, is likely meaningless. If you really are big and you like to hear that and she simply says it then good on you. Let’s let reality be reality here and not force anything because force often breaks things and people.

9. I have a very good friend that told me, regarding cock size, that the big ones were sometimes work to handle but that she’s met many men of average or smaller size that knew what they were doing and always left her wanting more of them in a good way.

Her most memorable lover was on the lower end of average (this is the one girl I’ve ever known who I believe qualifies as an engineer of penis size and there was no shame in her game).

10. On the other side, there are men with big cocks that are great lovers and when they pair with women who like big dicks then it’s magic.

But, the same goes for average and smaller men. There’s no need to disparage anyone’s size or ability as a lover out of jealousy or fear. It only makes you look immature and talking shit doesn’t change anything anyway.

Focus on being confident in who you are and sharing that person and cultivate good bedroom habits and technique. Control what you can control and let the rest worry for itself.

11. I believe pornography has created an epidemic of men who are afraid that everyone around them has a bigger dick than they do.

This can have terrible effects, psychologically, because it can translate to being bitter and overly passive or overly aggressive in non-sexual aspects of their lives.

If you believe that porn displays the average then stop it. If you believe you can never be a good lover unless you have one like “that” then stop it. Absolutely, stop it, and don’t look ever again.

It will only twist you up and lie to you. It is cock shaming. Don’t let a monied industry hurt you. You wouldn’t do that with anything else you put in your body so don’t do that with “erotica.”

12. Use “boy butter” to masturbate (search Amazon).

It’s marketed as gay ass lube but it really is the best lube I’ve ever used. I recommend it for non-anal sex with women as well. Yes, this was an aside.

13. Different men and women have different anatomies and temperaments.

There is no one size fits all regarding cock size. If you’re forgiving of differences in this regard then your relationships will go better and you’ll have less stress in your life.

14. I’m just going to repeat this because I think it’s truly important and I mean this physically and mentally.

Don’t ever stand for cock shaming. Leave or change your circumstances. Life is difficult enough without worrying about what you were born with. No woman of any decency will do this to you no matter what she prefers. More people than I’d like are not decent people. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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