Thought Catalog

If You Stay Friends, You Are Never Going To Get Over Him

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Girl who can't get over him
Unsplash / Aaron Huber

You are never going to get over him if you keep answering his texts. If you keep hanging out with him. If you keep him close instead of keeping your distance.

You need some space. You need room to breathe. You can’t pretend to be just friends when you know you will never be satisfied with that, when you know you will always want more.

You will never get over him if you accidentally flirt with him on drunken nights that he’ll forget about the next morning. If you break down into a mess of tears whenever he mentions another girl he’s interested in seeing.

If he stays in your life as anything other than a boyfriend, then you are going to have a rough time moving on.

Staying just friends is an easy way to torture yourself. To make every day harder than it has to be. And if you’re being completely honest with yourself, you know you’re only staying friends because you’re hoping it won’t last forever. You’re hoping that he will eventually see you in a different way.

But you are never going to get over him if you keep telling yourself there’s a chance that he will change his mind, that he will want you too, that you two will end up living happily ever after together.

You are never going to get over him if you keep replaying memories inside of your head. If you keep wondering where it all went wrong. Wipe his face from your memory. Wipe his texts from your phone. Don’t reread the messages that he sent back when things were better. Don’t listen to his old voicemails so you can hear the sound of his voice again.

You are never going to get over him if you keep checking his social media to see whether he found someone new. If you keep staring at his pictures, reminding yourself how sexy he is. How much you love his eyes. How much you want his lips. How much it hurts to live without him.

You are never going to get over him if you keep bringing him up to your friends. If you complain about him every chance you get. If you find a way to include him in every conversation you have because every little thing makes you think of him. Resist the urge to say his name. Resist the urge to talk about him when you know damn well he hasn’t even thought about you.

You are never going to get over him if you keep torturing yourself with sad songs. Stop finding a way to relate every set of lyrics to him. Stop thinking every get-back-together song applies to you. He is gone. That is not going to change. The only thing that needs to change is your mindset. You need to forget about him. You need to stop doing this to yourself.

You can get over him. But it’s never going to happen if you keep him too close. TC mark


A haunting collection of creepy poetry with a beautiful glow-in-the-dark cover, poetry lovers are bound to love this collection written by Holly Riordan. Centered on love, heartbreak, and loss with a candidly morbid twist, Severe(d) is as fun to read as it is to watch glow in the dark!

“This book just arrived and I already read it on my way back home and loved it, some poems even made me tear up, some were too relatable, some made me angry, this was exactly what I needed at this moment. Also, it has cute art all over the book 💀 and the cover GLOWS IN THE DARK! This is one badass book! ❤”—Amelia

“I adored this little book. The collection is very haunting, but anyone who has felt those overwhelming anxieties about life/relationships/waking up in the morning when all you want to do is sleep can find some relation to these poems. Wonderful.”—Shannon

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Poetry that will change you

This is for the women who are first to get naked, howl at the moon and jump into the sea. This is for the women who seek relentless joy; the ones who know how to laugh with their whole souls. The women who speak to strangers because they have no fear in their hearts. This is for the women who drink coffee at midnight and wine in the morning, and dare you to question it. This is for the women who throw down what they love, and don’t waste time following society’s pressures to exist behind a white picket fence. The women who create wildly, unbalanced, ferociously and in a blur at times. This — is for you.

“When Janne has a new poem written, I shut my life down to do nothing but read it, and then when I turn my life back on, everything is better.” — James Altucher

You’ve never read poetry like this before

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