Having High Standards Does Not Make You Difficult To Love

Girl with high standards
Unsplash / Dawid Sobolewski

Wanting attention does not make you difficult to love. Needing quality time together does not make you difficult to love. Expecting someone to treat you as a priority instead of a backup plan does not make you difficult to love.

Having high standards does not make you difficult to love. Asking for what you need does not make you difficult to love.

Besides, it shouldn’t be hard for someone who loves you to put down their phone while they’re spending time with you. It shouldn’t be hard for someone who loves you to speak to you with respect, even when they are pissed off. It shouldn’t be hard for someone who loves you to try their hardest in the relationship.

Anyone who is unable to meet your expectations is undeserving of you. Their lack of effort is either a product of their own laziness or a sign that they do not care about you as much as you care about them.

Either way, they are not the kind of person who belongs in your life. They are the kind of person who you can — and should — feel proud of walking away from.

Never lower your standards because someone who half-cares about you wants to put in half of the effort they should. Never let anyone convince you that you are too picky. Never settle for less because your person is refusing to give you the things you need the most.

You are allowed to have a list of requirements for your relationship — someone who listens when you talk, someone who answers texts within a reasonable time frame, someone who carves time out of each week to spend one-on-one time with you. You are allowed to get upset when your person shows zero desire to give you what you’ve been asking for. And you are allowed to walk away when you feel the relationship become off balance, uneven.

Despite what some will make you think, you are not asking for all that much. You are not expecting anything unrealistic, out of the question. When it comes down to it, you are only asking to be treated like a priority. You are asking to be seen, heard, acknowledged. You are only asking for the basics and if your person cannot give you that, you cannot give them your heart.

After all, expecting your person to plan dates from time to time instead of letting all of the responsibility fall on your shoulders does not mean you are difficult to love. Demanding someone to stay honest with you instead of telling little white lies to get out of trouble does not mean you are difficult to love. Hoping your partner will put in effort to become the best person they can be to keep the relationship strong does not mean you are difficult to love.

It means you know your own worth. It means your standards are set high enough. It means, one day, you are going to end up with a love that you deserve. TC mark

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