8 Things Old-Fashioned Men Get Right

  Sex and the City
Sex and the City

1. They treat women like women.

There’s two ways that modern men treat women: like they are one of the guys or as if they are so afraid of women that they become “nice guys” and yes-man the girl beyond what’s reasonable or appreciated. (Well, there are also guys who hate women in general but they are really too FUBAR to include in a dating article).

Old-fashioned men treat women with respect by being chivalrous, but also by holding them to a standard. They don’t throw themselves at a woman simply because she’s in possession of a vagina, he demands that she be smart, or kind, or well-traveled. It varies from man to man what his preferences are, but the point is that he has them.

2. They like women, and they aren’t afraid to say it.

They aren’t shy when they take an interest in a woman. They don’t believe girls have cooties or that dating one is a sign of weakness. They like sex — that’s normal and healthy, even if it isn’t politically correct. The difference is you feel desired and respected by their advances, not cheap.

3. They aren’t dependent on women.

Modern men often go from their mom’s house to frat house to their girlfriend’s house never learning how to take care of themselves — because they never have to learn how to. In their mom and girlfriend’s home, they can rely on her to do all this work on their behalf, in the frat house or their bachelor pad… it just doesn’t get done. An old-fashioned man isn’t content to live in squalor until he gets married to someone he will surely pawn this off on, he takes pride in his home, even if it’s modest. He doesn’t want to rely on other’s to fix his life. He’s not a baby, he’s taught himself to be a self-sufficient adult.

4. They are future-oriented.

The old-fashioned gentleman doesn’t YOLO. He’s conscious of cultivating things that will benefit him and his future: what kind of life does he want to have and what kind of person should be a part of that life?

5. They have manners.

There’s nothing sexier than a man who knows how much of a man a well-timed “thank you” or “hello, my name is…” goes. It’s not that sex appeal comes from these pleasantries, it’s that respected and confident men behave this way. It’s what separates a man you want to date from the boys who don’t bother to get up when shaking someone’s hand. The person who knows the rules of the game is more likely to be successful, and it speaks to how they’ll be have in a relationship, whether they are going to be courteous or emotional.

6. They have control over their emotions.

It’s often thought that women are the emotional sex and men are stoic individuals. We may socialize men to be stoic, but many of the embarassing public emotional breakdowns I’ve witnessed have been men losing control of their anger or jealousy and getting in public fights. Public fights are not chic. Anger is not chic. Jealousy is not chic. They are just not emotions you experience a ton when you’re rational and confident.

7. They know how to dress.

The old fashioned man isn’t a fashionista — that’s not a requirement. They simply know how to take care of themselves and present a positive first impression. There’s a reason Lord Disick is lusted after.

8. They understand the place of technologies.

Technologies should enhance your life and relationships, not replace them. If the latter is happening, it’s not technology’s fault — it’s yours. The old-fashioned man knows this, he’s in control of his own life and he knows how to use tools to make it better. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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