Thought Catalog

To Love Is To Be Vulnerable

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Clem Onojeghuo

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” – C.S. Lewis

This is one of my favorite quotes from C.S. Lewis. I think it speaks so clearly about what it means to love anyone or anything. It’s hard. It’s scary, and at times it’s downright depressing. But, it can also be beautiful, exhilarating and the best thing you ever decide to do.

Nowadays we are all concerned with the latest and greatest things we can get our hands on. That’s just the way we live, the way we have been conditioned to feel and carry out our lives. That makes love hard. Sometimes it seems easier and more logical to just not love anyone at all. To guard our hearts so that nothing can hurt us. That’s always an option, but not the one I recommend.

I’ve had my heart broken many times, and i’m sure I still have a few more to go through before I find my “happy ever after”. But then again, what is a good ending? Everything in life is uncertain, and the most uncertain and fallible thing is probably our feelings. Happily Ever After is for you to create, every single day of your life. Make it your best one yet. Don’t rely on anyone or anything to create it for you.

We are all constantly changing, sometimes in ways we can’t control, even if we wanted to. You just have to love other people where they are at. You have to take the risk and ultimately know that your happiness is dependent upon you and your mindset.

To love another is a choice. It’s a choice you make every day to decide to continue loving, to deal with all their little quirks and flaws, in the same way you would want yours to be overlooked. To last in love is to not give up. To keep going, and when something is working, take the time to fix it. Anyone can give up. Anyone can leave. It takes no bravery or resilience at all.

Be vulnerable. Let yourself feel everything with full intensity. It’s the only way to live. You will probably get hurt, most likely disappointed, but what’s living if you aren’t going to love in the full capacity you are capable of? TC mark

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