I’m Not Ready For Love (And That’s Okay)

musicFactory lehmannsound
musicFactory lehmannsound

I’m the friend everyone turns to for advice on how to be single. I’m the one who gets all the relationship drama thrown at me. I’m the one who is supposed to have all the answers because I’m ‘independent’ and can see clearly.

I’m the single friend, the reliable friend, making time for everyone and their problems friend. Which is fine, for now.

It’s fine because right now my friends are the center of my life, they’re the most important people. I don’t ever drop them for love. I don’t drop them for random hook ups. I don’t just stop talking to them and coming around randomly.

The only thing my friends have to compete with is my career and my family.

Right now that’s all my life is, work and family and friends, and honestly that’s all I can handle this time.

I’m not ready for love and that doesn’t make me weird or broken or missing out on anything, it makes me human. It makes me just like you except our interests are in different places. I’m not dropping everything looking for ‘the one’ because if I’m being totally honest, I hope I don’t find ‘the one’ for a little while because I won’t be ready for love anytime soon.

Right now I’m busy working on me, I’m working on bettering myself, getting my life on track, completing all the things I want to do and becoming happy on my own. I want to fill in the blanks in my own life, I don’t want to turn to someone and have them fill in the blanks for me. I don’t want someone to come in and try to complete me because I want to be complete on my own.

I’m not ready for love because I’m still working on loving myself and there isn’t enough love to work on me while simultaneously loving someone else.

I’m not ready for my life to change, for my emotions to be in the palm of someone else’s hands and my feelings to potentially be crushed because I let someone else have my heart. I’m not ready for the potential heart break and picking up the pieces when they fall because it’s taken me so long to get to this point and I’m not ready to start all over again.

I get asked all the time when I’m going to ‘settle down,’ part of me wants to scream when I get asked this, but the other part of me kindly replies, ‘I’m only 22, I’m no where close to being ready to settle down.

People put being in a relationship on a pedestal. People act like if you are single that there must be something wrong with you, that you must not be enough, that you are unlovable, but all of that is bullshit.

You can be perfectly happy on your own, you can be complete without someone to sleep next to at night and you don’t need someone to go on dates with in order to be enough.

I’m not ready for love and there’s nothing wrong with that, there’s nothing wrong with me.

You can look down on me, you can wonder what I’m doing wrong, you can tilt your nose up when I tell you I’m still single but none of that matters because there’s nothing wrong with being on your own and there’s especially nothing wrong wanting to be being single.

I’m not ready for love, and that’s perfectly okay because my life is complete and that’s enough for me. I’m enough for me. TC mark

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You look back and you just feel stupid.
You can’t forgive yourself for falling
or believing all the lies.
You reread every text.
You relive every memory.
And it all starts making sense —
he never wanted love.
He only wanted attention.
He only wanted validation.

“It’s just wondrous how every time I go through some emotional trauma, your posts are so relatable and it gives me so much hope. I love the writing and the photos. It’s all a pleasure to read. I can’t thank you enough for it, really.” — DM from @ThoughtCatalog Instagram follower

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