No, You Aren’t Ruining Your Life

Ivana Cajina

The internet is very into telling you how or how not to live your life. I’m guilty of it. Almost every writer in the blogosphere (HAHA I hate myself, I said blogosphere) has at one point attempted to guide you in some direction or the other.

Consider us your unqualified sherpas, urging you to the path we have not traveled. Because, dear readers, most of us are advising good advice that we rarely take ourselves. It’s easy to be wise in theory. A lot harder in practice.

So, here we are, explaining how to spend the rest of your alive days so you don’t regret them.

I’m here to say


We don’t know anything. We aren’t Tony Robbins. Also, Tony Robbins is a hack and creepy! Please don’t let that Frankenstein reject have any serious input on your life.

You will find meaning where you find it. A book. A person. Yes, maybe one of those articles I’m criticizing right now. And that’s perfectly okay. It’s beautiful, in fact. Because we choose inspiration when we need it. We pick what resonates.

But I never want you to think your life is ruined because you screwed up. I never want you to think because you missed an opportunity you are destined to a terrible life. You don’t ruin your life because you play it safe. You don’t ruin your life because things unfold differently than an #inspo movie would have you believe. You don’t even ruin your life by settling.


Because there is no such thing as a ruined life.

To say that is to devalue thousands, probably millions of lives.

We take detours. Passions evolve. Dreams change. And just because something you wanted to happen didn’t happen doesn’t mean your life is somehow ruined.

There will be times in your life when you listen to outside opinions more than your own heart. There will be moments you stay quiet instead of speaking your mind. There will be missed opportunities. There will be regrets.

And yes, there will be multiple failures. Because you’re human. Because you’re flawed and awesome and there’s no blueprint on how to live out your life.

Your life is the only one you’ve got. And on days it feels in shambles, it’s okay to cry or be frustrated. On days it feels like a never-ending victory, cherish it. Try to remember the impermanence of everything. Everything ebbs and flows.

The only way you ruin your life is by believing you did. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

✨ real(ly not) chill. poet. writer. mental health activist. mama shark. ✨

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