19 Things That Feel Bizarrely Good (And Aren’t Sex)

Counselman Collection
Counselman Collection

1. That glorious release of peeing when you’re super drunk. Honestly, it’s a close call what feels better when drunk: sex or peeing? #TeamPeeing

2. That exciting moment when the lights first dim in the movie theater and everyone stops talking.

3. When the lights come back on in the movie theater after seeing a truly amazing film and the entire audience just sits together in awe. Then someone starts clapping and it quickly spreads until the whole room is vibrating with applause.

4. The first bite of a “cheat” food when you’ve been eating super healthy. Hell, even just smelling it does the trick.

5. Sitting down to take a test and realizing your studying ACTUALLY paid off and you know the answers.

6. When a random baby smiles at you. Even those with the Grinchiest hearts, they can’t deny the ooey-gooey feeling from a beaming babe.

7. Sticking your fingers in candle wax and having it create some tiny finger mold.

8. When that hottie you had a MASSIVE crush on in high school casually “likes” something of yours on Facebook or Instagram. It’s like a sudden time warp and you are sixteen all over again.

9. Driving somewhere and hearing the PERFECT song come on the radio that exactly fits your current life situation. In fact, you’re semi-convinced the song was straight up written for you.

10. Groping yourself, but in a non-pleasure-seeking way. Just sitting with hands down your pants, chilling. Or maybe you’re watching TV, casually holding your breasts. So relaxed! So comfortable!

11. When it’s disgustingly hot outside and then a GOD SENT breeze blows through and you feel, even if only momentarily, refreshed and revived.

12. Introducing your best friend to a song you are currently obsessed with and them loving it just as much.

13. Walking down the street while listening to “Feeling Good” and pretending this is your big moment in a movie, complete with an empowering soundtrack. You just dumped that asshole or earned that big promotion and you are ON FIRE.

14. Hearing the words: “Don’t worry, it’s already been paid for.”

15. That electrifying moment RIGHT before a first kiss. Your lips haven’t touched yet, but it’s as if there is an invisible magnet drawing you towards each other and it’s one of the sexiest feelings…maybe ever?

16. Getting into your bed and sleeping in freshly laundered sheets. Mmmmmmmmm, so clean and cozy.

17. Checking your bank account and seeing that direct deposit went through. OH YEAH, WE GETTING EXTRA GUACAMOLE TONIGHT $$$$$

18. Finding out that you’re doing better in life than someone who used to routinely bully you. Heh heh heh.

19. Not. Having. To. Set. An. Alarm. Clock. PRAISE!!!!! Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Ari Eastman

✨ real(ly not) chill. poet. writer. mental health activist. mama shark. ✨

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